Adoption - Would you/have you considered it?

CAMSMOM1 wrote: I have always thought about adoption. Even though we can have children, I just have a heart for it. But DH isn't big on the idea, since we can have children.

I've heard it can be pretty expensive. Does anyone know more about that?


So, would you consider adoption or foster kids?

amymom replied: I think adoption is great. We considered it but then DS came along. It is expensive to adopt an infant, I've heard. However, we were looking into 'unwanted' or not popular kids to adopt. Like older children and children with disabilities. I think there are alot of resources available to help with adoption.

kayla's mama replied: We were starting to look into adoption because it was taking us 4 years to get pg and frankly, I gave up on having a natural child. We never got as far as finding out how much it was going to cost, but I did get some home prep work papers. OMG, your house goes through the most strict inspection imaginable. I don't think I could foster because I would to attached to the kiddos.

~Roo'sMama~ replied: I would love to adopt or have foster children someday... or both. Dh and I have talked about doing that after we're done having our own kids, but if the opportunity came up before we were done I'd love to do it then too. I don't know if we'd be able to adopt because of the expense though. We haven't really looked into it yet it's just something we'd both like to do.

TeagansMom609 replied: I have never considered it, but im sure if I couldn't have children of my own I would.

C&K*s Mommie replied: We have considered it for in the future when we are more settled, and can show it. As far as the cost, I have heard it can be very expensive too. But the cost would not be a deterrent if I know I can provide a loving home to a child.

My3LilMonkeys replied: I would not be able to do foster - I would become way too attached to the kids. As for adoption, if we couldn't have kids of our own we would consider it. But DH and I are both VERY fertile people so we don't have that problem.

Mommy2BAK replied: When I was younger I always thought I would adopt, but as I've gotten older that idea has faded somewhat in my mind. If I couldn't have children I would definately consider it.

ions_momma replied: I have thought about it alot, and DH and I have talked about it a few times. I would love to adopt a child. I think if I was going to adopt though, I would want a baby. I think it takes a very strong person to adopt older children, because there will be alot of emotional problems to deal with.

Fostering I dont think I could do though. My cousin fostered two little girls a while back. When the girls came to live with them they were 2 years and 2 weeks. For the first few months, the oldest, Ashley, wouldnt go around ANYONE except my cousin. Not even her other kids or her husband. When the baby was almost two years old they had to go back to live with thier birth mother. It was awful for our whole family. Especially my cousin and her husband. They raised those girls for so long, and the baby didnt even know her birth mother. It was really hard for everyone and i just dont think I could do that. I would love to adopt one day though, and I plan on bringing it up again after DH finishes school because right now we arent ready for baby #2.

kimberley replied: if i had the time and money, i would do it in a heartbeat.

i have another question... if, God forbid, one of your kids got pg young, would you adopt their child?

i would. no questions.

ions_momma replied:
Yes, I would without question.

My3LilMonkeys replied:
If they didn't want to try to raise the child on their own and approved, I most definately would. Or I would give them the option to still be the childs 'mother' but for DH & I to be the primary caregivers until my child was old enough to assume the responsibility.

For that matter, if one of my sisters got pg and didn't want the baby (they both have always insisted they never want children) I would adopt it. There's not much I wouldn't do for family.

luvbug00 replied:

since I am adopted this is a VERY hard subject for me. I am actually against it in some ways. I am actually very concerned with how adoption is handled (especially international adoption.). I think that the guidlines need to be changed. as far as your question goes Yes I would take mya's if she wouldn't be mature enough to handle it herself. (btw in my eyes this means 16 and under, anything older then that she is going to take care of her child wiether she likes it or not.)

MamaJAM replied: If we had not been able to have children of our own - we definately would have adopted.

Adoption is VERY close to my heart....considering that my brother and I are both adopted. Also - my brother's two children are both adopted.




Honestly - I could never be a foster parent (personal reasons).

MamaJAM replied:
No. I would support my child and grandchild...but I would not adopt my grandchild as my own child. I would expect my child to take responsiblity for their own baby...and be the parent ~~ I would be the grandparent.

MyLuvBugs replied: I was told at 19 that I probably wouldn't be able to have children, so I did think ok not a problem...There's always adoption. Even though my heart was a little crushed. But my DH when we got married said that he didn't believe the DR, and that we wouldn't have a prob getting PG b/c he has "super sperm". lol I guess he was right cause now we have a beautiful little girl and one more on the way.

I don't think that I would consider adoption now, but I do think that others that can't have kids should consider it (My Bro and SIL included). I also think that the process to adopt in the USA is WAY to difficult and expensive. From some family friends "It was just easier for us to go through an international adoption." and that's just sad.

MyLuvBugs replied:
No. However, I would help my child raise their child, but that would be my grandkid, and I would want that to be know to all parties involved. I wouldn't want that child given up for adoption to another family, but I would want my child to take on their own responsibilities. Does that make sense? I feel sometimes, that some kids (a girl in my HS class) just keep having babies and giving them up for adoption b/c they can and they don't learn anything from it. Make sense?

luvmykids replied: I don't know if I could handle foster parenting, because of the attachment issue, but on the other hand I think it's an awesome opportunity to have such an impact on a child/ren who need it so badly. We've also talked about adopting later, when the kids we already have are older, but we've only talked about adopting older children who are difficult to place.

I don't know that it would ever truly happen, but I sure think it's a great thing, I really admire people who do it and do it well.

mom21kid2dogs replied: Feel free to PM if you want answers to specific questions. I was a social worker in adoptions for 22 years.

Jamison'smama replied: Yes! I would certainly adopt--my sister is adopted and she adopted a 7 year old child from Russia 2 years ago. We think very highly of adoption.

CantWait replied: I would love to adopt a kid, or two if we ever had the money to do so. Fostering would be another thing also when I'm older, and the kids are out of the house, but I don't think dh would go for either.

fashionmumofboys replied: If I could not have children of my own, I would adopt all the way.

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: I would adopt if I couldn't have children. And if one of my own children got PG at a young age, I'm not sure I would adopt their baby, but of course I would be there to help. It would just depend on the situation I guess. I would much rather see the baby go to a couple that desperately wanted a baby, but it would be a hard decision.

3_call_me_mama replied: Most definately. Wether we can have our own children or not.
It is expensive if you want a white american kid right after birth. (Not to mention the WAIT!) If you have an open mind and heart it is far easier adn cheaper to adopt. International adoptions fomr guatemala or other nations are fairly cheap and can be quick. We have looked into it and will most likely adopt at some point. Or do foster care. My only concern with foster care is teh emotional attachment. We had an exchange student for a year dan it was heartwrenching to send her home. But to raise a child and have ti go back to a potentially dangerous place is just too much for me to take i think.
As far as my kids children... I will not adopt them as my own unless it were an issue of my child wanting to put them up for adoption. but i still woudl most likely just raise them and inform them taht they were actually born to my child and i would love tehm no matter what. But i woudl strongly discourage my children form havign sex at an age that they weren't ready to raise a child so as to prevent the pregnancy rather than get to teh adoption step. But they would be held accountable wehter they wanted to or not. (Meaning that it wouldn't just be that i had another child to raise. )

jcc64 replied: We considered adoption after my 2 boys. Dh and I were both intrigued by the notion of forming such intimate bonds with someone that is not biologically connected to you. We looked into adopting from Korea (where he was born), but the expense was more than we could bear, and we decided on a 3rd biological child instead.

Cece00 replied: Maybe if I could not have had children I wouldve adopted. I dont know, though. I've had 3 of my own kids & I'm pregnant so its really not an issue for us- this is the last baby, we have both boys & girls.

If my child got pregnant, I would support (emotionally) my child if she wanted to raise the child, and I would support her (emotionally) and probably encourage her to give the child up for adoption, but not to me. The child I am pregnant with is the last child I will raise.

Not only that but I have an aunt who did that for her daughter (raised her child) and she tried to do it to her AGAIN. She basically just kept having kids & trying to dump them on her mom. Not responsible.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I would most definetly adopt if the situation presented itself. My mother was adopted in a non traditional manner and I feel like if I can give a child the same chance my grandmother gave my mother...then yes, I'm all for it. Scotty on the other hand is not real supportive of adoption, but would be on board 100% if it was something I felt strongly about.

ETA: We are through having children, but you never know what life can bring your way. My grandmother was 40 when she adopted my mother! She had been finished for a long time. Her only son was out of the house. She also had a step son who was out of the house. She always said she went thru childbirth one time and wouldn't do it again. She was so proud of my mother and still is.

Edward's Mommy replied: I would love to adopt, but my husband and I have issues agreeing on this subject because he was adopted when he was 4 and before he was officially adopted, he was sexually and physically abused.

~~*Missi*~~ replied: Chris and I ttc 2 years to the day almost when we FINALLY got pregnant with Sabrina. So we talked about adoption all the options. We were on clomid and everytime I had an ovulation test and it said NO i was devasted.

Chris said he would never want to do like my eggs someone elses sperm or his sperm someone elses egg. He said that he just doesn't have a reason per say its just not what he wants. I dunno MALE thinking!
We talked about IVF with ours. We talked about surrogacy with two complete donors.
We talked about adoption

We have lost 3 precious babies since Sabrina and well we are back to talking about it again. I am beginning to think again that its hopeless that if I want more then I have no choice.
So we have thought about it alot. Adoption seems to be the option chris and i are both most comfortable with. I don't know thou how my heart could take getting exciting and having something happen like you hear. I cry thinking about this...I can't imagine these people who decorate and buy just to hear OPPS sorry not you after pretty much giving the AOK. Ya know

C&K*s Mommie replied: I would not take the child in as my own, through legal adoption, unless our girls ran away from their responsibilty. But I would be there 110% to support our girls, if they got PG at a young age.

But I also will not be used, if they decide to get PG many times, only to shift their duties onto me. I am only a helper, I will not be the provider full-time.

holley79 replied: Abosolutely. Some very good friends of mine are foster parents. I feel in love with a set of brothers they had. I was heart broken but happy to learn an Aunt was taking them in. Well I just found out she doesn't want them now. There is no way I could take in two boys right now. I really wish I could because I would take them in a heartbeat.