Any other DHs brain dead when it comes - to doing basic baby/household things?

Daniels Mommy wrote: MINE CAN BE!!! ARGH...He is such an awesome daddy but he SUCKS at the basics : diaper changing regularly (ie when DS is up from his nap), doing dishes, taking out the trash.....All I have to say is it better change now that I'm going back to work....

gr33n3y3z replied: Umm ..... nope my hubby has always helped me with everything and still does when he isnt working

Daniels Mommy replied: well, my hubby is helpful but he's not THAT helpful, KWIM?? I just hate having to ask him if he changed DS's diaper when he got up from his nap....ah well....

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I truly think men are just programmed different. I'm not sure they even think about diaper changes or any of that other stuff. My DH is wonderful with the yard work and taking out the trash regularly. He even remembers to set the trash out on Thursday mornings for the trash guys whereas I don't even have a clue what day it is most of the time. He is great at doing the dishes and laundry, too, but he doesn't always do them....just when I'm really behind. He is very anal about the house being nice. He has also gotten MUCH better with helping out since we had another baby. Maybe you should have another!

Mommy2BAK replied:
ROTFLMBO!!!!

Thats a nice solution!

loveydad replied: omg HOW many of these posts are there going to be!?|!?

I've never been brain dead about it. I guess it's something you learn. Of course with my twins and younger I've been home iwth them twenty four seven

When I was wiht my ex, they knew how to do everything, they knew what they were doing but it was frustrating that they didn't know as much as I did about baby gear..ect. They were happy to shop with me for it though.

Tav's WONDERFUL on that note. I'll hear the baby cry, know they're okay and my hands are full and I'll go get tehm 2 minutes later and she'll already have them halfway changed!

Daniels Mommy replied:
and it's MY DH who wants to have twins next time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ammommy replied: I tend to treat my DH like a toddler/preschooler (sorry, guys). I didn't used to, but he has given me cause to. He constantly tests and I constantly remind him of the rules:P
Really, though, he is great with the kids. It's just the household stuff that bugs me.

annafrombc replied:





I guess you are above norm. My DH is pretty good but really, Evan could be whining and he just sits there. Im the only one who can distinguish that he needs a bottle, diaper change etc. He does try but it just doesnt come natural to him. I think women are programmed to know this stuf better. Im always the one that answers the whines and cries. If he does, he ASKS me what Evan needs (Im psychic you know...lol).
I know there are superdads out there. My DH really TRIES to be sometimes. As far as housework. Argh! He is great at yardwork adn taking out the trash. I guess I cant expect miracles.
ANNA

annafrombc replied: I think I need to figure out how the QUOTE thing works huh???

Josie83 replied: No Jason has always been a superdaddy! He LOVES taking care of Cassie and does a really good job. I'm very lucky! xx

coasterqueen replied: OMG, my DH is better about doing all that stuff than I am. So if an award is given out in our house it would have to be to my DH because I'm the lazy one.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Loveydad, I think she probably meant SO (in her defense) You are obviously one of a kind, here. It is obvious you would never expect Tavia to do these things and I think that is why it works so well. You appreciate her when she does help out and she enjoys helping b/c she feels as though she is being rewarded and appreciated. (hmmm....I wonder why we can't get it to work like that in our house! )

Also, I think it is different when you are put in the situation to HAVE to do these things. When I'm not around, Scotty is super dad and house cleaner extraordinaire, but if I'm here he expects me to do all of it b/c he doesn't have to worry with it. If he does have to lift a finger b/c I am busy doing something or just taking time for myself, he comes looking for me and gets huffy. Now, if I weren't here, he would never question it.

Alice replied: I think it's a matter of who spends time with the kids. In many households, the woman is the one spending the lion's share of the time with the kids, so of course we're the ones who know which cry means what-- we're the ones who have had the chance to figure it out. When the guys get home from work and spend just a few hours with the kids, they don't have the time to see the patterns we get to see all day. (And I KNOW lots of women work; I did until after #2 was born. But it still seems that much of the time, the women spend the time with the kids, the guys do the yard and the garbage and all the traditional roles.)

During the summer, when Peter is off for 2 months, he's a lot more attuned to the kids than during the school year... quicker to catch on to the cues.

loveydad replied:
oh okay. I just get extra cranky about these things because there's been like a hundred posts lately about men who don't do anything! STupid Men. I wish they'd stop giving us good men bad names.