Are you freaking kidding me?! - I can't believe this.

Hillbilly Housewife wrote: Ok I need some help here.

I sent a termination letter (finally!) to the mother of the two children I had in my care, further to the older child pulling my vanity out of the wall in my bathroom, telling her that it would be best for all involved if the child was removed from my care, and placed with someone who could give him 100% consistency and 100% attention, 100% of the time. I explained the trouble we've been trying to deal with, along with the home care visitor and the Agency supervisor, and my reasons for termination.

Of course, she got upset, which is understandable... but she made allegations towards me that I have kicked, punched, pulled hair, bitten, starved the kids, and made them sleep on the floor. I hope you all know me enough that I could never do that to anyone, much less a child. Talk rudely? If provoked enough, maybe. But be violent? NEVER.

OMG. I'm freaking here. THe agency is backing me up 100%, and called the ministry to get advice... this is RIDICULOUS.

What's the percentage of abusers accusing others of abuse? Something like 85%?

I'm so upset. What do I do?!

Calimama replied: I have no clue but I wanted to send you . Hopefully they see right through her LIES and write her off as a bitter, revenge seeking person.

grapfruit replied: I don't have much advise. Here's the little I do have:

You have other children in your care, correct? I'm sure they can back you up on the level of care that you provide their children. It's one of those things where, you do the same thing the same way everytime then it's hard to prove you did something like that? KWIM?

Anyway, I'd give you hugs, but it sounds like you need a punching bag instead.

Mommy2Isabella replied: I know kind of the situation you are in, I was accused by family of neglecting my step-sisters daughter. Needless to say we no longer have a relationship

stella6979 replied: I'm not sure how all the legal stuff works, but I would hope that they would be able to see right through this woman. I mean, if you did do the things that she's claiming you did, why did she not report it earlier? She waits until now to bring it up? Only one word for her......LIAR!!!!

grapfruit replied:
That's horrible.

all around

Hillbilly Housewife replied: They wree the only two children in my care, the others are my own.

I have a logbook FULL of incidents that he's done. The agency is aware of the trouble I've been having with him. The home care visitor has told the mom on more than one occasion to have the kid attested. The other providers are writing me some letters of character and witness accounts of the kid's behaviour and the mom's behaviour towards her kid.

Also, a good thing, I'm getting a letter attesting to the fact that this kid was as awful at her place.

I'm just FREAKING. Like, what a total BIT**. Even her own mother told her she needed to have a hotel room for her and her kids when she came to visit. Didn't that tel her anything?!

moped replied: People say things like that when they get angry and I certain the agency knows that and is why they are backing you 100%

amynicole21 replied: She is clearly insane. I'm so sorry.

A&A'smommy replied: I agree with Amy, she is insane!!! That sucks Rocky!!!

~Roo'sMama~ replied: Oh wow that's awful! Is the kid maybe telling his mom that you're doing those things, and that's why she's accusing you? That happened to someone I know where a little boy in her daycare just flat out lied to his mom and said that my friend had hit him, and the mom believed him and got most of the other moms to pull their kids out of my friends daycare. Some parents will believe anything that comes out of their child's mouth.

punkeemunkee'smom replied: That sucks! Why now is she bringing it up? If she had prior knowledge of you doing all these things towards her children-it was OK til now? She sounds a little off to me! I am sure the angency knows the truth....I highly doubt that they would have placed children in a home where there was even a chance they were going to get body slammed before their lunch of bread crumbs and water

Boo&BugsMom replied: Hang in there Rocky. People like this just like to take their anger and frustration out on someone else. It's easier for her to blame you than to take blame herself for the way her child is. I have dealt with many people like this, thank GOD none in my home, but many nonetheless. She will get what is coming to her it due time. For the record...my daycare children sleep on the floor. On mats, but still, on the floor...so that little accusation is just plain pathetic. Just hang in there. This will pass sooner or later.

luvbug00 replied: what an evil woman. i'm glad your being backed 100% good for the angency! evil evil woman!

mummy2girls replied: oh no my dear!

You know I went through a termination a couple months ago because the younger one was violent, evil aggressive! The mom of course got mad and then told the agency i left the kids home alone, i never went to pick her older son from the bus stop but rather let him find his way back and cross a busy street by himself, etc etc. She didnt ever accuse me of abuse though:(

Just do what the agency says to get this all straigtened up. She doesnt have solid proof so i dont think anything really can come out of it:( Im sorry rocky im not sure what to say. I followed protocal from the agency to get this mess fixed and erased from my records with them. but the one thing that really got it erased is that this mom enrolled her kids in a dayhome from teh agency and she did teh same thing to this provider:( And i learned to really document alot of things with my present and new families and change my way of things. stay one step ahead of the crazy parents

Keep me updated hun!

Hillbilly Housewife replied: I just had a phone conversation with his previous caregiver (who also happened to be my previous caregiver for my kids, so I have a good relationship with her), and she said she'd write me a letter of character that never ever did she see a bruise on my kids' bodies that weren't there when they left for the day, etc etc, about my kids being well brought up, polite etc etc, not the "abused type" of either too quiet or overtly loud,

AND

She is going to write a letter witnessing that in the entire 4 years she had him as her charge, he acted much the same way, and attaching a copy of her logbook.

I've already got 4 people to write letters for me.

holley79 replied: I'm sorry she is doing this to you Rocky. Glad to hear you have 4 letters on your behalf.

grapfruit replied: I don't think you have anything to worry about. You're one of the good ones, and it seems like everyone knows it!

momofone replied: I'm sure things will work out in your favor.

CantWait replied: Rocky I'm so sorry, but glad there's so many people backing you up. Hang in there.

aspenblue1 replied: I hope everthing works out for you.

gr33n3y3z replied: I give you ladies all the credit in the world with running day homes and what not bc of ppl. like her I would never do it again.

If the agency is behind you I wouldnt worry about it to much she is just pissed bc she failed with her monsters