Aron won't babysit:(
mummy2girls wrote: Well His words were...ill let you know when it gets closer to that date... 
My sister got 2 tickets to the canadian country music awards. They are doing the award in Edmonton this year:) And that means i get to see some of my fav performers live! The tickets are sooooo close to the stage.
What would of happened is on sept 13th i would get off of work early and get jenna from daycare. get ready quickly for the awards and have aron come over to stay with jenna. The awards is from 7 till 10pm. So i would be home by 11pm the latest. Jenna goes to bed at 830 so the rest of the night he can watch tv or surf the net. And then he would leave to go home at 11pm. This is a perfect way for me to get away from always having a child attached to my leg and enjoy adult company!
I am with kids 24/7 because i work with kids. So to me this would be wonderful. but he said he cant say yes until it gets closer...NICE!!!!!!!! I freaked... I told him it must be nice to be able to juggle your lifstyl;e around and not have the responsibilty of getting babysitters and such when you want to go out. I can see it now. When i need him to take jen for the night if i have a date he will say no just to make my life heck!
Josie83 replied: Shelly that's really mean of him . . . what about asking your mum to babysit, or do you have a close friend you trust with her? I don't mean to jump to conclusions but from some of the posts you put on here it sounds like he doesn't deserve to see Jenna! Let us know how it works out, I hope you enjoy the concert!! xx
MommyToAshley replied:  GRRRR! 
This is his child, and partially his responsibility... he would not be BABYSITTING! Babysitting is when you take care of someone else's child. It sounds like Aron needs to grow up and be a man and take responsibility. Sorry, but that just makes me mad!
mummy2girls replied:
I know... aron had to get jenna from daycare today as i worked late. And he brought her to his place. Well when i got there they were putting together his internet(dial up). And he was on the couch with jenna. he says to his sister...go and hand mark that cord... his sis says how come we are the one putting your internet together. and aron says because im babysitting. His sis says... its not called babysitting its called PARENTING!
Boys r us replied: I hope that you're able to find someone to watch her so that you can go enjoy yourself.
Shelly you need to get tough girl! Set down some rules and if he can't abide by them or agree to them, then you need move on..soon enough he'll realize that if he wants to see Jenna, he'll see her when he can..even if it means he has to give up some of his free time to watch her while you're out!
Kirstenmumof3 replied:  I'm sorry you have to go through this with Aaron! I agree with what everyone has said, Jenna is his child too! I hope you can work something out and that you are able to go the the music awards!
amynicole21 replied: I agree with Nichole - you need to make some rules! From the way it sounds, Aron gets away with murder Perhaps make a rule that he is responsible for Jenna AT LEAST 2 weekend nights a month. He just wants to be a parent when it's convenient for him
Boys r us replied: You know..the more I think about this..the madder it really makes me!
Girl, men are like 4 yr old children, they're going to do what they can get away with and if everytime he wants to see her, you jump in the car and go over...and cater to his wishes, then that's how it will be! don't let him take advantage of your generous nature and your desire for him to be in her life..and that is EXACTLY what he's doing! He knows you desperately want him in her life and he's playing that card on you over and over! Stand up for yourself and for Jenna too!
Don't let him walk all over you anymore Shelly! you need to sit down with him and say..THIS is WHEN YOU CAN SEE HER, IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER! PERIOD!
and let him know that these visits will be him and her. Tell him that you see her all of the time, she doesn't need you there to visit with him, she needs that special one on one attention from HIM! Don't let him hold all of the cards...b/c in fact YOU DO..you are her gaurdian and if he wants to be a part of her life for all the reasons a parent should want to be, then he'll do whatever it takes and before long you'll see whether his intentions are earnest!
kimberley replied: ITA about putting your foot down with him! you need to take control of the situation and tell him what is happening instead of asking. it is like a stupid little game to him that he can pull your strings like a puppet. he knows you really want to go and he is just being a jerk about it .
Kaitlin'smom replied:
I total agree............you need to set the boundries and stop letting him have the control. He makes me so mad
I certanlly hope we dont offend you, I know being a single parent is not easy (my sister did it and it was horribly ruff on her) but you have to take a stand. I dont know what the laws are where you live or how your custodie and visitation arrangements are but he needs to be a father all the time and not when he has time....which does not seem like hardly ever. gurrrrr can I come kick him in the you know what.....
Guest replied: He is a jerk!!!
Boys r us replied: I certainly don't mean to offend you Shelly, I just think that the best friends a person canhave are the ones who will be honest! I was a single mother with Tanner and I went through much of the samethings you are with Aron, unfortunately it took me too long to realize that what I was allowing to happen was doing more harm to my son than good and I put a stop to it. He didn't pay me child support, he saw him when it was convenient for him..which generally was when his family was in town so he could put on a good show. When Tanner was 4 and Tan and I could carry on a good conversation, I realized the harm all of this had done to Tanner. But see, I never wanted to be the bad guy, I never wanted to be the one to stop their "relationship" from growing. I desperately wanted his father in his life..finally I saw that me forcing a so called relationship wouldn't work.
So I stopped it all! Then one day he grew up and called me and aske dme to see Tanner, I said no..everytime you've ever been in his life you've made a mess of him and walked away until it was again convenient for you to be involved! I am his mother and I have to stand up for him b/c no one else will!
He took me to court after that last NO and got visitation 1x every other week. He hasn't missed a saturday since! So he did grow up but it took me telling him enough was enough before that happened! My situation was much liek the one you're in..I was always the one bending to his rules and his free time...and it always included me getting in my car, wasting my time and my gas and changing my plans so he could see Tanner..only to get there and have us ignored while he hung out with his family or friends! So I can sympathize with you...but only he can change himself and until he decides to change, you are the one who has the power to change the situation you are in by saying it's going to be this way!! I have no doubt you can do it Shelly, I say that b/c it take sa strong women to raise a child alone and if you're doing that so well, then I know you have the strength to stand up to this puppet master!
My2Beauties replied:
ITA with this comment. My DF's family makes me mad when they say stuff like that. My DF plays a lot of sports and what not so when he is at home alone with her while I'm at school or whatever, his aunt and grandma will say so you're BABYSITTING tonight...I'm like UGH *pulling my hair out with frustration* it's not babysitting, this is his child, you guys dont' say I babysit when he's not at home and I'm alone with her, so why is it babysitting for the guy.
Society puts a huge emphasis on the fact that it's always the mother who is the caretaker for the kids and while yes, dads are more involved nowadays, it's still not enough! A friend of mine always says "momma's baby, daddy's maybe." Who is it that the child goes with when parents split-up? I guarantee 95% of the time, it's mommy! Who only sees their child once a week or maybe once every other week for "visitations (which by the way sounds like you're visting someone in prison)" the daddy when the mommy bears the burden of being mommy and daddy, daddies get to sit back and not help raise their own children. Im' sorry and I'm not referring to every man because my DF is a wonderful father and his 8 year old doesn't live with us but she stays the night at our house at least 2-3 times a week and he takes her everywhere and does everything, not when it's convenient, he will go to the store at 10:00 at night to get her a bag of chips if she calls him and asks him and that is how it needs to be. But society needs to learn that this isn't acceptable. I have too many friends that this has happened to and I feel for them, most of their men if I see them I want to kill them.
Shelly, for your own sake as well as Jenna's please do not let him treat you this way! You deserve better than this and so does Jenna. He is playing games with you and it's not acceptable. I'm with all the other moms on this board, stop catering to his every whim, make him be a real dad or fight it out in court! Bottom line,..don't take anymore excuses from him because if he continues at this rate, Jenna will never respect him and in turn may not respect your choices when it comes to letting him see her! She may resent the both of you, I've seen it happen!
mummy2girls replied: thanks for your honest oppinions. You didnt offend me in anyway:) I know i have to strand up to him and make boundaries and such. The thing about this all is arons family is more on my side than his. They get to him when im the only one driving jenna to see him, that he never wants to do anything with jenna alone. doesnt help with diapers and such. aron always says to me to bring jenna to his house because he wants his family to also see her. Well his sister says to him you can go pick her up and bring her to us also. you cant depend on shelly to all the time. And once the snow hits the ground there is no way im driving on that freeway to go to his house in my car. he can take his butt into his 4x4 truck and do the driving...
coasterqueen replied: I definitely think you need to be firm, put your foot down, and make some boundaries with him. Let him know he IS the parent, too, and that comes with responsibilities that he obviously doesn't seem to think he needs to have. Grrrrr!
Go give him $#*&^$#! And stand your ground! 
momof2girls replied: I totally agree if he wants to be part of her life he needs to be a father to her, you must have tons of patients, cause Id have to ring his neck!!!!
His family should be on your side, he is WRONG!!!
Some men dont want to grow up!
A&A'smommy replied: awww hun I'm sorry!!! ((((BIG HUGS)))) I would definilty tell him he needs to do it and not think about it, she is his baby too!!! GRRRR Shame on him for being so stupid!
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