Attention dads with daughters

nhbmark wrote: Hi folks

This may not be exclusive to dads, but here goes.

I have a 20 month old daughter who's really never taken to me too much.
She's a momma's girl & beautiful little girl with a lot of energy and imagination.
I try to hold her & she's always looking for that escape route.

I wonder if anybody has any tips,
I really feel pretty down when I see the relationship she has with my wife,

Is this normal?

redchief replied: Two things come to mind. One, don't be picky about the times you have and hold her, and let it be OK that she's a little cranky with you. It's natural for most babies to be most comfortable with mom, especially when they're tired. My most special times with my girls were not play time, but near bed time. We both got to be close together while we let the day's stress go.

The other is not to expect the same kind of closeness they have with mom. Your relationship with your daughters will not be the same as her relationship with her mommy. That doesn't mean that you can't be close and have a special bond. Don't give up. It sounds as if you love your daughter very much. She knows, and will respond and you both will develop a unique relationship together.

TrulyBlessed replied: My daughters are both daddy's girls. He went through some hard spots, but he just kept cuddling with them and spending time with them. There have actually been times when they have favored him over me. LOL

It sounds like your daughter is just going through a case of seperation anxiety and she is clinging to mom right now, but I agree with being persitent. Daddy's are heros to their little girls.

luvmykids replied: Yes, it's very normal. Especially if she is with mom most of the time. Like the others said, just don't give up and try to keep a lid on your frustration or hurt feelings....my DH didn't do a good job of that and it made things a little harder.

Hang in there, she'll come around

nhbmark replied: Thank you all very much,

This is great, I'll be patient..

mckayleesmom replied: If she spends a great majority of her time with mommy then its totally normal. My son is still like that with daddy and hes 3. He lately has been favoring his dad more when he comes home. My husband started doing 1 on 1 stuff with him....letting him come to the office with him, going to get haircuts together, shopping for a new toy together....things like that...

kit_kats_mom replied: My DH didn't really bond with our youngest until she was more human. As a newborn, I think he was kind of scared of her.

Now, he's great with them. He usually takes care of them in the evenings, giving them their baths, reading stories and putting them to bed. And he takes them to the playground or for bike rides all the time.

They were a little more partial to me when they were younger but now they are all about daddy.

My2Beauties replied: A lot of children at that age go through seperation anxiety and seem to flock more towards the mother, my oldest did this. Don't worry she is 4 now and is a daddy's girl to the tee. My DH's oldest daughter who is 12 is also very much a daddy's girl too

nhbmark replied: You guys & gals are just great!!

Thank you!!

sparkys2boys replied: I agree, it's very normal. And most kids do tend to go through this stage back and fourth some. One minute they want mom and then the next they are all for dad. Don't let it worry you, just keep letting her know you are there when she needs you!

Hillbilly Housewife replied: yeah... I just kind of started dumping the kids on dh when he got home so 1) I could take a break, and 2) so he'd spend more time alone with them.

Nowadays, he does the dinner/bath/bed routine, and I do the wake up/breakfast/school routine mostly because I work evenings... but they're closer with him than they used to be, and sometimes I find myself in your position.. wanting to cuddle my kids but they want daddy.

wcs40110 replied: Aww, its good you want to be so involved. My daighter was a really big mommies girl until reciently when Dh was laid off. It just seems the more time she spends with him the closer they are. I'd suggest spending a little time every so often with just her. It might be a little odd at first but she should warm up good luck