Do any of you - always feel guilty???

mom2tripp wrote: This seems to be a constant with me. I always feel guilty that I'm not being a good mom, I'm not giving Tripp enough attention, I don't do enough for him, I don't give him enough toys to keep him entertained. AND then when I go somewhere for one second without him I feel like I'm being the worst mother in the world. HELP--please someone tell me that I'm not alone in feeling like this!!!

ediep replied: you are not alone....I still fel that way and Jason is almost 3, although the guilt isn't as strong as it used to be. I still feel a little guilty for putting him in the child care room at the gym while I work out for an hour a few times a week.

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: I'm with ya there!!! Totally guilty! Every minute, every hour...I'm always thinking that I "should have done" or "if only I had". It's especially hard when you have lots of friends with babies the same age. I try not to compare, but it's hard when you see their kids with a million toys and/or they're saying words that your DS can't. It makes me think that maybe I'm not talking with him enough...as a matter of fact, I remember you said in one of your posts that you talk to Tripp while you feed him and describe everything you're doing. This made me feel guilty (no offense)...but I certainly don't talk to Wil enough, so I'm working on it!

booey2 replied: You are very not alone here. I feel that way a lot of the time, especially when my mom is around and thinks she can raise them better by making all kinds of backhanded comments.

mckayleesmom replied: Im glad Im not the only one. I want my kids to look back when they are older and say "you were a awsome mom..couldn't have asked for better"....but Im afraid they are going to end up in therapy because of the stuff I mess up. Like losing my temper with McKaylee....I have really been doing good about not doing it in front of her...I don't want her earliest memories to be of mommy being grouchy to her.

moped replied: Krisit - you are a FABULOUS mom and he loves you!!!!!

I do know what you are saying but I have tried to get over that feeling a bit in the last little while because I couldn't go get groceries without that feeling - I am sorry you feel that way - I think it is just a normal thing for moms to feel!!!!!

MyBrownEyedBoy replied: Since I am a WOHM, I absolutely feel guilty. But I try to realize that there are reasons I work.
#1 I like it, I am proud of my degree and love what I do.
#2 It makes me a better mom I think. I have nothing but admiration for SAHMs, but I would go nuts.
#3 If I didn't work, Logan wouldn't have insurance and wouldn't get the care for his heart I know he needs.
#4 I do my best, and my family and DH know it and tell me I am doing a good job.
But I still feel like I could do more, though I don't know exactly when I could do more.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I ALWAYS feel guilty. Always Always Always. I never lay my head on my pillow at night without feeling guilty. I feel like I don't do enough for them, with them (socially, intellectually, physically, etc) I know I love them to bits and that is one thing I don't feel guilty about, but I have a short temper and well, that leaves me in a mess every night. I was just talking to Scotty about it last night. I don't have ANY help and you know, I don't expect help. It is my job to raise my kids, but my husband leaves at 7 every morning and gets home at 10:30 or later. (every night) He only has Sunday off. I dont' get a break. I"m never away from my children (only for an hour a day at the gym which is my sanity these days). Anyway, I hate to make excuses for why I'm so burnt out, but I really am. I'm exhausted. Some days it just isn't fun anymore. Don't get me wrong...I LOVE my children. I couldn't live without them.

A&A'smommy replied: No your not alone!!! I think your a great mom!!!

mom2tripp replied: Thank you all--I'm so glad I'm not alone in this--I hope one day it will go away!!!

Insanemomof3 replied: You are not alone. I have felt that way. Everyday in fact I worry that I am not a good mom. I have done things though that make me feel that way. I spent some time away from my kids, that contributes to my feelings.

I don't feel guilty anymore about going out with out the kids but I do worry about the attention and toys and such. I know how you feel.

Kaitlin'smom replied: join me in I work and I always feel bad leaving her espically on the days she wants to stay home with mommy and going out even more cause I miss her and feel like I should be with her. I dont go out by my self anymore, unless I have to for an appointment, and dates with DH well hardly ever. makes me sad I feel guilty, I know I need me time so I take that at luchtime during work or when she is sleeping. I am pretty sad huh?

MomToMany replied: I've been dealing with guilty feelings ever since my first was born, everyday. I always feel like I'm not doing the right things, or should be doing something better. I look at my older boys and think "how screwed up are they gooing to be?", and hope & pray that they will turn out fine.

Not sure how to get past these feelings. I feel overwhelming guilty for not trying harder to nurse the boys, or using cloth diapers on them, but you can't change the past (although I would in a heartbeat if I could). I just try to be that much more of a good mom to help make up for it. I've apologized to them for it too. They say, "It's OK mom!", then I start crying.

I think most moms try to do their best, and all have some sort of guilt of things. You're doing a wonderful job!

dolfinrse replied: I feel guilt when I have to leave Zack with my mil for anything. By the time I come back, he has done so much with her, I just can't compete and then she thinks she does a better job or knows more about my kids than I do. "Do you know that Zack likes this" "Look this is Madison's favorite way to be held".......I feel like saying No kidding, they are my children so I should know.

I am also feeling guilty now when I have to take care of Madison and Zack has to wait a few minutes for me to do something with him. I'm sure he will understand when he is older.

CMScrapmom replied: I have two kids and an age gap (DS is 9, DD is almost 4) so i feel REALLY guilty constantly. It's hard to be totally fair to each of them given that they are really living two totally different lives with me guiding them fully through it and trying to not 'slight' one of them on any given day. (Ex. DD still needs me to fall asleep with her, DS still loves me to read to him before bedtime - we're into the Harry Potter books.....they both want this at the same time, DD is not willing to fall asleep while I read to DS and can't tell y'all how many times DD is finally asleep so I go to read to DS who is now......you guessed it...ASLEEP, having waited for me and finally konked out - without his stories).......That's just a small example but it's stuff like that ALL day. When school is back in session I feel a little better since DD gets me all to herself all day long, but DS never really does anymore. They bicker, I intervene as best I can but again, not always fair on my part I'm a WAHM so even though I"m home, I'm often working (even though I work daily at 4:00 a.m. until they wake up, sometimes I have to work during waking hours, sticking them in front of a video for longer than I'd like).... I could go on, but YES, I totally feel guilty every single day. They are GREAT kids, well behaved, respectful, smart, funny, seem happy - I try to tell myself I'm doing something right somewhere even if none of us knows what it is yet!

CantWait replied: I sometimes do, not very much because I know i'm always doing the best with them that I can. I try not to think how much time I spend with him, but rather did we have a good time, did we have a laugh. If we didn't have at least one good laugh, then we didn't have a good time. It's so hard though to think about whether or not we're doing as well as we should with everything that goes on wheter you work inside or outside the home. I know you're doing great, and how much you love your little one.

DblTblDad replied: i always feel guilty that i can't live up to what my wife is and that she isn't here to be with them. i feel bad that they will grow up without her around. I always feel guilty that i don't know enough.

Jamielou replied: same here i always feel guilty