During labor and after the birth - how many people

Bee_Kay wrote: I was talking to my sd yesterday and she is getting nervous about labor and delivery.

She asked me some questions that I will throw out there for all of you.
(in the delivery room, she wants her BF and me in there)

Who all was outside waiting for your bundle of joy?
How many people were there at the hospital while you were in labor?
Were you bombarded with friends/family right away.

She was considering having a more "intimate" experience..... Only having me, my dh, her bf, ashley and tyler and the bf mom there the first day.

She was wondering if it would be rude to have only immediate family there at least the first day and then start having other visitors either the next day, or wait until they are out of the hospital.

What do you all think?

mammag replied: I only wanted Chris in there with me during the delivery. MIL & all the other kids came to see the new babies when they were born. When I had my first my sil & her bf came to see and that was embarassing because I looked ridiculous and I barely knew him. My parents only came to visit at the hospital with the first.

1lilpeanut2love replied: Who all was outside waiting for your bundle of joy?
NO one, it was a work day[monday]. LOL

How many people were there at the hospital while you were in labor?
MY SO, my Aunt, and my cousin

Were you bombarded with friends/family right away.
Later on in the day!!! I had Kaylee about 6am. I didn't mind people coming at all. I wanted to show her off!!

Kaitlin'smom replied: In the room I only allowed DH. We did not tell people I was in labor, other wise several woudl have show up. When I what being wheeled for an emergency c-section DH freeked and started calling family. I was not so thrilled for them to see me in recovery, glad they came but felt and I know looked terrible. Most friends came the next day or 2. I wish I could have been more persentable for guest. Overall I did not have a great birth experience, but all that matters now is I have my daughter.

youngmomofone replied: I only had dh and my mom in the room with me the whole time since dh's family was still in Mexico.

When his parents finally came, they brought 15 people with them. Then they returned that night with another 10. I had a c-section so I was feeling horrible so that just made it worse. In fact my BP was a little high after they left.

I don't think it's rude to only have immediate family in there at first.

JP&KJMOM replied: Who all was outside waiting for your bundle of joy?
With JP my parents and my best friend and her husband oh and Jason's uncle who we are very close to were there and then the in laws came a little later the same day.
How many people were there at the hospital while you were in labor? Same as above

Were you bombarded with friends/family right away. Not really most came the second day but we were there for 3 days.

It is all about how comfortable she is and what SHE wants! She is going to be exhausted so have her tell everyone (friends and extended family) to wait till she gets home if that is what she wants to do.

How much longer Barb? Have you thought of a name yet for yourself that is!

TheOaf66 replied: i don't think so, she will be so drained etc that everyone should respect that and let her rest a bit before they come and visit, I think we had her parents visit us first day but that is cuz they were helping out that was it...people will understand.

~Roo'sMama~ replied: There were a lot of friends and family out in the waiting room while i was in labor, and some of them came in and out of the delivery room to see me. While I was pushing, I just had Dh in with me. I liked having so many people out there waiting but I felt really bad because it took forever, and a lot of them had to leave before they could even see the baby.

holley79 replied: Who all was outside waiting for your bundle of joy? Just about everyone in the family.

How many people were there at the hospital while you were in labor? Everyone was in the room while I was in labor and only DH and my mom were in the room for the delivery.

Were you bombarded with friends/family right away. Oh gosh yes.

I don't think she should feel guilty at all for only wanting so many people in the room/ at the hospital with her. This is her day with her baby. I was so out of it the first day I didn't care who was there. It was nice the next few days to just have a few family members. I had the golden rule of at least 2 weeks before friends came over.

Bee_Kay replied:
LOL Karen.... I figure it's just gonna be "grandma"..... I am slowly adjusting to hearing "your granddaughter"!! LOL It's not such a shock anymore when I hear it

She has 2 months left to go.

They (she and her bf) just turned in applications at an apartment complex where the rent is based on income..... so that works out pretty good..... also, it apartment buildings are 1/2 block away from my house. They are pretty much guaranteed an apartment because the manager there is my DH's stepsister. She just has to run a criminal background check (which is clear for them both) and a credit check (neither of them have any credit yet).

So, they will probably be moving in within a week.

JP&KJMOM replied:

Glad they have found a place of their own so that you can help her in the beginning. I am sure that you would probably feel somewhat uncomfortable trying to visit if they were still with BF mom. I hope she realizes how much she is going to need you at first just to be able to rest. Keepingmy fingers crossed that they get approved too grandma !

Bee_Kay replied: You're right Karen. It wouldn't be too comfortable going to visit at BF moms house. I would do it, but it wouldn't be as comfortable.

The apartments are actually pretty nice and clean. Very well kept. Amy figured their rent would be around $250.00/ month (all utilities included except electricity). I believe the guidelines for rent is 30% of income.

He makes about $700.00 - $800.00/ month.

They still have high-hopes of attending college this fall (2 weeks after the baby is due)

All I do is smile and say "we'll see"

AlexsPajamaMama replied: While I was in labor DH, My Mom and my cousin were in the room. Some one called my dad to tell him I was in labor and he and my step mom waited in the waiting room down the hall and came in after.
I had him at 8:27pm on a Monday and didn't have any visiters until the next day.
We didn't leave the hospital until Thursday morning and had quite a few visitors in and out the couple days we were there.

Bee_Kay replied: Thanks for the quick replies.

When she asked me, I just told her that the labor/delivery is HER day and the decisions are up to her and what SHE is comfortable with.

1lilpeanut2love replied:
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5littleladies replied: When I was in labor with dd #1 the waiting room was overflowing with people waiting for me to give birth. I loved it! In the room though, I only had hubby, and my mother (against my wishes ). After she was born I let everyone come in to see her-I couldn't wait to show her off.

With dd #2, again I had some people waiting-not as many as the first time though, and this time I let them come in and out of the room when I was in labor-that labor was super easy though! Again I had hubby and mother (again against my wishes ) in the room when I delivered, and again everyone came in to see her.

With dd #3 I only had a couple people waiting, and I don't really recall if they came in or not. I don't think so, but I was really drugged and labor was really hard! Dh was the only person in there during delivery (thank goodness!) and I let the people who were waiting see the baby right after delivery.

With dd #4 I had some people waiting, I don't remember how many. I let some of them in during labor, but I did ask Sara to keep some of them out for me (lol!). Again only Dh in during delivery, and again I let everyone see baby right away. In fact Sara got to hold Lissie before I did! I didn't mind though-I was just glad to be done and that Lissie was ok.

I love having people there to share my experience with me. I know how excited I get when other people are having babies (I was there almost the entire time when Sara was in labor) and I'm glad people feel comfortable enough to come and wait for my babies to come into the world!

KingMom replied: I only had my DH with me during delivery, but while in labor I was allowed to let people rotate in and out.

My parents and my in-laws were in the waiting room almost the entire time. My best friend stopped in and saw me but couldn't stay, I still had a long ways to go.

The next couple of days, while in the hospital, friends and family came to see us. A few more came by once I was home but really on close friends/family. We weren't bothered at all.

MyLuvBugs replied: Who all was outside waiting for your bundle of joy?
None. We didn't call anyone b/c we just wanted it to be Dh and Myself. This time my parents and Lorelei will be waiting in the waiting room.

How many people were there at the hospital while you were in labor?
None. (Same as above)

Were you bombarded with friends/family right away.
Not really. My parents came the next day, and Dh's parents stopped by for a couple hours within the next week. This time I'm sure there will be a ton since 80%of my family lives around here.

I don't think it's rude to ask that only immediate family show up the first day. She's going to need all the rest she can get while in the hospital, so it's probably better that she limit the number for the first day anyway.

na81 replied: When I was in labor everyone from the family tried to get there- considering I was only in labor and delivered after 4 hours, some didn't make it in time! But SO was the only one in the room when I delivered. I had a room and hallway full of people after delivery and it was a bit dificult because SO and I didn't get much time with her by ourselves. Heck, I didn't even get a chance to get up and pee until the nurse finally "kicked them out" to get me up! Honestly, I think the nurses were a bit annoyed with all of the people because they kept asking "Do you want this many people in here right now?" Although I wanted everyone to meet our precious little one, I would have rather they had waited until the next day to visit (once I had a chance to take a shower )! I don't think it would be rude if she didn't want company right away, if she wants to be alone with the baby, then that's how it should be! After all, she is the MOTHER!

moped replied: Well.......I ended up having an E C Section, but in labour Tom, my mom and my sister were there.................in the OR it was just Tom and my mom and sister watched everything and video taped it all through a window - kinda neat actually.

I have no idea who was waiting, cause I was in labour a very long time, maybe Tom's parents were there...................I don't remember much after surgery for many hours.

Tom did not want a bunch of visitors for hte first week or so, my mom and sister stayed at my house and thank god because I would have been mental with out the. Gradually people started visiting.

ediep replied: int he room with me was my DH and my mom. Outside in the waiting room was my dad, my sister, niece, other sis, aunt, uncle, dh's mom, dh's bro and his wife. I didn't mind the visitors while we were at the hospital.

TheOaf66 replied: to add to my previous post, the only ones in teh delivery room was me and my wife, we told everyone else to go home and we would call them when we were ready.

Ashlynn's Mommy replied: I had to have an emergency c section. my bf was there(of course), my mom, my two sisters, and my brother. They came in to see me before i went into the or. While i was in there they went out to dinner to celebrate, and then they came back to see me. I was pretty upset, bc I was in the hospital for 5 days, and not many people came up. My inlaws came once, my brother came once, my sister came once, and my bf was there all of the time. I planned on having a vaginal birth in the begining of my pregnancy, and the hospital allows the father of the baby, and one other person in the room during the birth. Well let me just say that there was major arguments over who was going to be in the room. so I guess I was better off with the c section. S orry sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo long. Ilike to blab

Boo&BugsMom replied:
WAIT...correction honey. I was in labor for 13 hours. My dear old brother stuck around in the delivery room to keep Oaf (Troy) company until I started having to push or get checked (didn't want to brother to see that...ick!). When I started pushing only my hubby (Oaf) and I (of course) were in there, but my brother was still outside in the waiting room. Later that day my parents, my cousin and her husband, and some other friends and family came up to visit.

TheOaf66 replied:
so sorry I meant that in the room it was you and I

jaytrevjax replied: I had all 3 of my DS after 8:00 pm, which I LOVED because, I didn't have visitors untill I had a good nights rest. (Well as good as rest you can get after giving birth.) Although, with my first, my mom, DH,& MIL were the only family I had in delivery, with my second, it was just me, DH & Mom (because it was a C-section) and my last, just me, DH, and Mom. My last one I had at 4:15 am, and was given Phenigrin (sorry about the spelling for all you medical people) because I was Pucking with every contraction. The medicine made me so tired, so after Jax was born, I breastfed him, and concked out!!! I kind of remember my Dad bringing my siblings in before school to see me and the baby, but I was so out of it I barely remember seeing my dad sitting in the chair at the foot of the bed, and don't even remember my siblings being there! That medicine sure worked, but boy did it knock me out! anyway, I was glad we didn't have tons of people there, and I had time to rest before people started coming to see me!

Boo&BugsMom replied:
I know, but we had lots of people come visit that same day. I was BORED out of my mind and wanted visitors as much as possible.

TheOaf66 replied: I shant speak of things I know nothing about anymore

PrairieMom replied: I only had my DH in the room for both my deliveries. I wanted an intimate experieance, something special between just the 2 of us. With Alexis I asked people to wait until about 3 hours after the birth before they came to visit. That gave us time to meet our baby, for me to nurse and to get settled in our post partum room. really Noone came to visit us in the hospital, other than imedieate family, and I prefer that. We had a open house just last night actually, so friends could come meet our new little one.

luvmykids replied: Who all was outside waiting for your bundle of joy?

With the twins, FIL and fiance, my parents.
With Macie, nobody.

How many people were there at the hospital while you were in labor?
With twins, FIL and fiance, parents, SD, SIL, one of DH's friends. Delivery was in the OR so just DH and mom.

With Macie just DH.



Were you bombarded with friends/family right away.
YES! The twins and I had 11 visitors starting about 3 hours after and up until that evening.

With Macie we were remodeling/adding on to the hospital where I gave birth so all our employees were right there. In fact my window faced the building they were working on at the time (ground floor) so they'd all knock on the window and motion for me to hold her up.

I don't think there is anything at all wrong with the way SD wants to do it, it's a personal time and whatever you want to do to make it special is fine IMO.

CantWait replied:
I don't think it would be rude at all, it's her having the baby, and she should be comfortable with the experience.

When I had Robbie, I had only Ron in the delivery room, he was the only one the doctors etc would let in, my mom wanted to also. In the waiting room I had my mom, brother, and a couple close friends. The next day was very busy with guests, and I had a hard time fitting in a shower.

When I had Anthony, my mom and Ron were in the delivery room, no one else was there waiting, instead I had one visitor the next day.

My3LilMonkeys replied: Who all was outside waiting for your bundle of joy?
Brooke - DH, mom and MIL were in the delivery

Madison - DH & MIL in the delivery room

How many people were there at the hospital while you were in labor?

Just those in the delivery room both times.

Were you bombarded with friends/family right away.
Yes. Lots of family in & out the whole time I was in the hospital with both kids. I didn't mind - I like to be around lots of people.

ITA that your daughter should do what she is comfortable with.

Liz_Kaitlyns_Mama replied: I had a c-section and only one person was aloud in the operating room so, of course, it was Darrell even though my mom wanted to be in there so badly. I felt terrible but she didn't complain, I mean, that's Darrell's place.
My mom was waiting with Darrell's mom & 5-year-old niece. Darrell's dad had a doctors appointment across the street (he has cancer) and by the time D's mom got back from picking me up I had just had Kaitlyn.
Afterwards my step-dad came with my two brothers (4 and 22). Those are the only visitors we had. We didn't even have visitors after we got home. My grandparents (stepdads parents) waited until we brought her out which was at Christmas.