For those with kids who have sensory issues

coasterqueen wrote: As most of you know we struggle with sensory issues with Megan. School has been a BEAR! She hates school, she cries every morning that she doesn't want to go. Getting her to learn things is just IMPOSSIBLE. With all the school she missed with KD I wasn't sure she'd even graduate Kindy, but I'm hoping she does. At the first part of the school year all the way up until this past month we struggled getting her to color semi-properly. Her teacher would send notes home constantly about it and finally it's clicking that she actually needs to color, not scribble. I know she says it's pointless and boring, but still it's one of those IMO stupid things they make them learn (color in the lines) and so I've dealt with it. We've also struggled getting her to count to 100. Last quarter she finally got up to 39. Well we got her report card the other day and she only counted up to 29 this quarter. As soon as I sat down to talk with her about it she counted all the way to 100. I asked her why she didn't do that for her teacher and she just shrugged her shoulders. We've also practiced over and over the value of a penny, nickel, dime and quarter and she just refuses to even try to tell us the value of a nickel or dime. Penny and quarter she's fine with. Reading is another problem. She just absolutely REFUSES to learn to read, even a three word sentence. She says she doesn't need to read and doesn't want to learn. I know in first grade they get a LOT and i mean a LOT of reading assignments to do at home and I'm so not looking forward to it because I know it will be a battle. I'm trying to remind myself we have many months left before 1st grade starts and maybe, just maybe she'll wake-up and have the umpph to want to learn.

Anyone else deal with this? Any advice? I have tried everything and this kid just does not care. Her teacher sent home a note with her report card that we need to know the value of the money by the end of the year, as well as counting to 100. Also she said Megan is INCREDIBLY DEPENDENT (and she put it in all caps) and we need to make her more independent. I try, believe me I TRY, but this kid just doesn't care about ANYTHING and I do mean anything.

ETA: FWIW I think Megan is incredibly smart, she just doesn't want anyone to know it. She doesn't want to put forth any effort at all, even if she does know it. If this kid graduates high school I'm going to be amazed, lol. She just does not care. She says she wants to go back to Pre-K where they get to play all day with toys. Funny thing is she cried every single freakin' day about going to Pre-K (and she went for two years!)

luvbug00 replied: Mya is just like this (as far as not wanting to go, not willing to make any effort and not showing anyone how smart she truly is) However I chalk this up to her being lazy and not a sensory disorder.
I cant even imagine how hard that has to be...
What do they mean by she is too dependent??
I mean with Mya if I didnt hoover over her NOTHING would get done. Kid is so ADD and lazy she would have failed out by now.
The only things I can relate on is the reading (if I don't have any interest in the topic, I'm not reading it period...)
and not wanting to go to school
To this day I HATE going to Myas school functions because they are in a school. School was a frustrating (because I stunk at it), mean (because the other kids teased me), it just never brought to me any kind of happiness. I literally break out in a sweat when i enter a school building.
To this day I wish I had just taken my GED and dropped out at 16.
TBH the whole sensory issue is a new thing for me. I didn't learn about it in child development and so I'm still learning what it all entails. So I'm sorry I'm not much help.
I just want to hug you for busting ur bum to do the best you can. your such a good mommy!

coasterqueen replied: Thanks. The sensory disorder for Megan when it comes to school is she needs instruction one at a time. You can't tell her everything she is going to do on an assignment all at once. She has to be taught it in steps, which makes lots of things very hard, even when you do try to teach it in steps. Try teaching Reading in steps, it's terrible for me.

luvbug00 replied: That sounds like Mya and me..she isn't a "forward thinker" or problem solver at all. you have to tell her step by step on everything.

I actually just went to the website and down the checklist. It screams Mya..I wonder If I have been missing this all this time..obviously the severity is less then Megan but what an eye opener.

anyway sorry trailing off there. Hope someone can get you some strategies to help you get her to where she needs to be and show what she knows.

boyohboyohboy replied: Karen, while Jakob doesnt display the sensory disorder the way Megan does. (at least not right now) I do worry about getting into the school system.
I take him tomorrow to sign him up and cant wait for the big immunization discussion. Jakob hasnt had most of his shots because of his allergies and his immune system. He doesnt handle them well, and doesnt get an immunity the way others do. People can get mad, but he is more likely to get sick then make anyone sick from not having them.
I wasnt risking his health any further.

But I wonder if the schools have a person, a partner so to speak like the Early intervention? I know that ours ended when he turned 3, but does the school have someone that could sit with her and keep her on task just until she gets the idea that she has no choice but to do this? May some constant positive reinforcement at school, if there was someone she liked, and respected that was her partner. Not a kid but an adult?

I was thinking I had heard this from our OT when Jakob was young that they had kids that they went to school with, but maybe it was young kids and that "school" was preschool?

coasterqueen replied:
Yeah, you need to get an IEP and I'm not doing that. Our therapist has recommended strongly against that. Then the school has control over her therapy and she will have to continue to have an IEP all the way through high school. Her therapist thinks between her therapy and my educating the teachers enough it will help. I'm not sure, but I'm also not ready to give the school control and give her that label yet. I've known so many people, including a co-worker who struggled with the schools and IEP's. I've heard successes too, but I don't really think getting her an IEP is really going to make this any better, honestly. It's not going to change her outlook on school, because to be quite honest her outlook on school is similar to a LOT of things in her life. She could give a rats behind about just about everything Kid is a very unhappy child and I can't ever figure out why.

I didn't do early intervention, either, as I was strongly recommended to go through a hospital therapist. I don't trust our state with a toothpick, let alone my child to do early intervention. And that's a strong notion for me because I have a very close friend who works early intervention and would more than likely be who we deal with and she recommended NOT going EV, so I didn't. Our therapist is one of the best in our area, but I'm wondering if I shouldn't try the one that my friend uses for her autistic boy. The problem is she pays to have this therapist drive from St. Louis, which is almost 2 hours away

coasterqueen replied:
Kylie fits the SPD checklist more than Megan does. The key is there are some children out there who CAN and KNOW how to deal with those issues and then there are children like Megan who just can't...their world falls a part with the sun shining. So Mya probably is like Kylie in that she can handle it fairly well.

boyohboyohboy replied:
I'm sorry your having a hard time finding a route that works. Every SID child is so different. It's hard to get advice.

I'm very thankful for our early intervention OT. She came to the house which was such a help. I cant say I learned techniques that helped but it showed me what didn't work.
She was very nice, but also was ok when we disagreed on treatment.
I can see where the schools being involved might get messy.
After our experiences with Caleb and the school guidance councilor calling him ADHD and anxious, then threatening us with social services, I get not wanting them involved.
You would think they would only report to the family.

I guess her teacher is going to have to find a positive reward that is worth doing her work for.

How are the teachers with the SID diagnosis? Do they roll their eyes or work with you?

coasterqueen replied:
Some teachers work with you and some don't. Her Pre-K teachers were AWESOME about it and were open to being educated and doing whatever they could do to help teach her the way she needed to be taught. Her Kindy teacher....not so much. I wrote her kindy teacher a really long email yesterday asking her for more information, etc, etc so I can get the therapist to give me more help. I know she read the email, but I have yet to get a response.

boyohboyohboy replied:
The last time I wrote Calebs teacher, she had called home and said she thought he had an attitude with her. So we talked to him and then I wrote an email to her for an update three times, and got no response. I then sent a note to school with Caleb and no response...its been two months. I just figured if she finally does respond now, she will see what a real attitude is ....

I cant think of anything more frustrating then dealing with teachers...oh yes I can, bus drivers!

grapfruit replied:
IMO this is why it's important for the rest of us to have our children immunized. To protect the kids that can't.

I don't have a lot of experience w the sensory issues, but I give hugs to all you mamas that do.

coasterqueen replied:
Well she responded and she's really ticked me off.

Apparently I read her notes wrong, so I feel incredibly silly about that, but she was quite snotty about that error. Also, i told her how Megan cries every morning about going to school and says she has no one to play with at recess. The teacher's response was

"I am surprised that she does not like school because I see no indication of her disliking it. She does play well with her classmates during free-choice and I am surprised that she would not have any one to play with outside at recess when there are four kindergarten classes."

Ok, well that's not how she is acting at home, but fine. BUT the last sentence peeves me off. Just because there are four freaking kindy classes out there at once doesn't mean anyone will play with her!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't expect the teacher to make someone play with her, I just wanted to know what was going on on the playground, meaning did she see Megan try to interact with others or does she just go off on her own.......

I also asked if she thought Megan was on track in Kindy, etc and she didn't respond to any of those questions.

Her email basically made me feel like a paranoid psycho mother.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: She sounds exactly like Ethan!!

We got Ethan's report card yesterday and his teacher wrote a little note on there that she thinks he has dysgraphia. I had never heard of it, but I googled it and it fits Ethan to a T!

Karen, I used to push him to read and write every single night and I stopped. The fights were just too much and the stress it was putting on him was unfair for a first grader. I realized that it wasn't laziness--but something was wrong. I just didn't know how to confront the situation. I figured the school would catch on and his teacher did say that they won't do anything until next year.

He has always had sensory issues--he gets it from me, I'm sure. And, I've flirted with the thought that he was also on the spectrum of autism. Neither are severe enough, though. He has GREAT behavior (99%) of the time and he is super intelligent in all other areas. He just has difficulty with letters and writing. But it's not dyslexia.

Anyway, I feel your pain. I really, honestly do. I don't want Ethan to be labeled as a bad kid--I want him to get the support he needs so he can excel in school. I feel like this school is really great about it. So far we haven't had any issues.

boyohboyohboy replied:
So what is your next move? I have an awful time getting the teachers to respond. I think emails are ok for presenting concerns to the teacher, allows her time to gather the info. But then I think the teacher should call when she can. I know she is busy and I don't want to call to pull her from class, or have her be hurried in her response to me.
It's frustrating.
I keep hearing teachers want parents to be involved but in the past three yrs. I haven't met a teacher yet that was happy we were watching his grades or asking regularly what was going on in class.

I hope you can get the teacher to see you are trying to work with her so Megan can enjoy school.