Getting frustrated

A&A'smommy wrote: Sorry guys but I need to get this out... every time my MIL walks in the house my stomach immediately starts tensing up... I wake up stressed out because if the house is too messy she gets (well excuse me) but pissy and it’s REALLY annoying..

we have decided not to buy right now because it would be REALLY tight so we are looking for an apartment which sucks because we aren't going to be able to take all our stuff so therefore we are going to have to leave a bunch of stuff in her attic where she go throw MORE junk on top of it.
She YELLS at Jeremiah all the time about his homework which is NOT going to get him motivated to do she should KNOW that being his mother. I can't STAND living here and its only because of her my FIL is great I love him to death he doesn't do much except sit in the living room and watch TV and oh yeah eat lol but he has cancer and needs to get better (which since he hasn't been working he has) he has like literally 20 kidney stones divided in both kidneys.

It’s really making me miserable and I'm starting to take it out on Alyssa and THAT is making me CRAZY I feel guilty ALL the time about not cleaning something or yelling at Alyssa for something stupid I feel like such a horrible mother!!! Don't get me wrong something she can be really great but she has a BIG mouth and she is a "know-it-all" AND she doesn't ask me before giving Alyssa something, like Sunday after having cake for the first time Saturday, she gave Alyssa some pork what if she had a reaction, and yesterday she gave her chips and I don't give them to her because she chokes (and then of course pukes when she has a hard time getting it up! ) and on top of that she gave her flavored chips. And when I said something about it she said "I thought they were crackers". And they are saying that we should stay until the first of the year so if they move we can stay here uhhh that isn’t happening I'm NOT being responsible for HER house!!!

I am just SOO frustrated but I'm also worried about the neighborhoods I don't want to get into another bad living situation, like at the trailer that was scary. I still don't feel better but I wish I did.... my chest is SOOO tight right now I could scream. AHHHHHHHHHHHH She is making me hate her and I don't want to say that but that is how she is making me feel, she is even turning her other kids against us last time we were in Missouri my BIL (Jeremiahs sisters husband) had the nerve to tell Jeremiah that if here were a "real" man he would pay half of ALL the bills here, well just to let him know we told her that if she let us live her for a little while (which by the way she was ecstatic about) then we WOULD pay rent and whatever else they need help with well NOOOO she won't let us pay much of anything. And I know they have said other crap behind our backs I would like to tell them where to go!!! Anyway this has gotten too long so I will stop now....

kimberley replied: ((((hugs)))) sorry to hear things aren't getting any better over there. that has to be hard on you. i know it is hard but try to remember this is temporary and Alyssa is the only screaming you need to deal with. She needs her mama sane, so let the crap his mother dishes out just roll off you. it isn't worth your stress. we are here for you... vent away! :grouhug:

mummy2girls replied: OH man!!!!!! Ims o sorry! I have no advice because i have no MIL. but i do in a way know what it feels to be living with a family member you dont wqant to but have to for a while!!!!! My sister was a nightmare roomate!!!!! Hanfg in there hun! I know you wanted a house but just think at it this way...you can move into a place that doesnt include your MIL! LOL. Apartments arent that bad. But i know the feeling of wanting to be in a house. I want to so badly live in a townhouse with jenna but financially i cant right now!

ctymom replied: I'm so sorry you are having to go through all that. I personally know how much it sucks. I had to live with my inlaws for a few + years!! When it was bad, me and the kids would stay in my bedroom just to get away from my MIL. Not a way to live at all.

I hope something works out for you soon... for your sanity. I would have moved into a 1 room shack just to move out! lol My heart goes out to you.

Pamela

Nicole replied: Sorry your going though all this crap, i hope you guy`s find a nice safe place real soon, then you can tell them all were to go and how to get there.


Good luck to you hon, and i`ll be praying every thing works out for you guy`s.

Boys r us replied: Oh honey! I'm sorry! It's hard as a parent to be so stressed out and find a way to release that stress without the child feeling it! It's so hard!
I don't think you're a horrible mother, but you just know that right now you're incapeable of being the BEST mother you can be b/c your MIL is overbearing!
Find a place to go even if it is your mom's house!

MomToMany replied: I"m so sorry you are going through that. OI really hope you get out of there soon. It's not a good situation for any of you, especially Alyssa.

My X-MIL used to have a notebook and wrote down everything I did wrong, or everytime I screwed something up. If the X & I got into a fight, she wrote that down too. Needless to say, I found it and burned it, LOL. We had to pay half of all the bills there as well. I'm so glad I got out of there, and that I got divorced from that whole family. I LOVE DH's family, mostly because I never talk to them!

I'm wishing you the best of luck trying to find another place.

Kaitlin'smom replied: gosh I hope you can find something soon. sounds like its not good for anyone you being in her house. Keep looking and something will pop up (and I hope for your sanity) its soon.

hang in there (((BIG HUGS)))

TANNER'S MOM replied: I have with family and it is the hardest thing you have ever done. My husband and I and all our kids stayed my SIL, while we were waiting for our house to be finished. It was awful and it has effected our relationshio ever since. Do what you can to relieve the stress, and realize that she is going to be your MIL for the rest of your life so do what you can to salvage the relationship!

We are all like that when it comes to our house, we all have little quirks, and you will be the same the way when u get your apt..and that is the fun thing about being all alone!!!

Josie83 replied: Jess I'm really sorry to read that it osund slike you're having a really difficult time at the minute and you really don't deserve it. I know what it can be like to have a mother-figure breathing down your neck alll the time, it really doesn't help anyone. I'm sorry there's suhc a bad attitude for you, remember we're always here for you tho any time you need us xx

favre4fan replied: Arghh I know how stressful that can be. I lived with my ex hubbys mother for awhile when we first moved to Texas in 93 and we did not get along at all. i triedto make the best of it but evetually we just had to move out, we got along much better after that! I hope things work out for u soon!! At least you can come here and vent!!!

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Oh honey...I'm sorry things aren't any better. I hope you guys can find a place soon. I know I would never be able to live with family. You do what you have to, though. It's a pity that she has to be that way towards you and make you hate her. It won't be much longer.