He's really about to push me over the edge...

my2monkeyboys wrote: Will had been so bad lately!! For the last 7-8 weeks he's had a bad attitude, been talking back, not listening... just driving us crazy! I even took away his favorite video game - for 4 weeks! Each time he'd say something else I'd take another week and he just could not shut his mouth. He just had to say that one other sentence, he couldn't let it go.
He's being so great with Waylon, but I swear I'm about to string him up! I hate to take everything away, but I feel like I'm running out of options. He even got a big spanking about a week ago bc he was talking so rude to us, but not even 2 days later he was back at it. I'm about to go nuts!
I'm really hoping this is just a phase that will be over quickly - I don't know if I can take much more.

cameragirl21 replied: He's probably just adjusting to the new baby. In as much as he loves the baby, I imagine it's hard to go from being an only child and the center of your parents' world to having to share most of the attention with a new baby. He's probably just acting out to get attention and to make sure he hasn't lost his place in the family, so to speak. As hard as it is for you to adjust to a new baby, I imagine it's even harder for a little kid, kwim?
Hang in there.

my2monkeyboys replied: I know, that's what I've been thinking, too, even though it actually started a bit before Waylon came along. I'm sure he was feeling the stress from it before the actual birth. Which is why I've been trying to let things ride, but it's getting to where he's acting out every where, and to every one. Adjusting or not, we can't allow that. I imagine it'd be much harder to deal with it later than now, too, you know? I just don't know what would be the best way to handle it.
Any ideas, anyone???

cameragirl21 replied: If possible, try to do some things just with him. Do you have someone who could watch the baby while he naps? Or if not, maybe take him out for a walk (Idk how cold it is where you are now so maybe that's an idiotic idea) and while the baby naps in the stroller, play with just Will. Or play with him in the house while the baby naps.
He just wants attention, I suspect that's why the punishments don't work...he's still getting your attention, even if it's negative attention.

TheOaf66 replied: yep, got the same issues with Tanner right now. No advice just sympathy since we're in the same boat.

luvmykids replied: I'd try what Jennifer suggested, finding ways to spend a little more time with him. It helped the twins a lot when Macie came along to include them in doing the things I needed to for her. Also, if she was fussing, sometimes I'd say "Macie, I'm doing such and such with Colt, just a minute baby" or something along those lines....it reassured them that THAT BABY didn't take their place. My kids go through phases like that and even short amounts of quality time, 15 minutes even, if I can be totally focused on them, do wonders.

A&A'smommy replied: I'm sorry sweet I really do hope he gets better for you guys and that its just a phase!!

CantWait replied:

AlexsPajamaMama replied: I feel this coming on at our house too as my due date approaches
My only ideas are tons of positive reinforcement, ignore the little things and have as much " big boy " time with him as you can. Even if its not much.. make a big deal of hanging out with him, and how much fun you have playing with him. I am alreadt trying to let alex know we will have time to snuggle and read and do big boy things that the baby wont be able to do.
Maybe if you can... a little time just you and him outside of the house like a trip to the store. Surprise him with a special treat. I dont know. Its probably all easier said than done with a new baby at home, Im not there yet, but trying to prepair myself for what is to come!

momofone replied: Maybe the baby is waking him up in the nite it might be affecting his sleeping which may affect his mood. Unless they are on different floors.

my2monkeyboys replied: Thanks for the advice - and sympathy!
I am sure I need to spend more one-on-one time with him. I'll have to figure out some time during the day for that. As for sleeping, we only have one floor, and although Waylon is in our room right now, I'm sure he has woken Will up, though Waylon generally just grunts when he's waking up to eat, no real crying most times.
I'm hoping between me scheduling more Will time and just time itself that things will improve.
Thanks for listening to me whine... that helps a lot, too.

mummy2girls replied: im thinking its because of the new little one in teh family. Im sure he loves his brother but its hard to go from him only to now 2. My SIL has a 3 yr old girl and a 11 motnh old. and she has been very testy lately for her parents. she will have outrageous tantrums, hit her parents and so much more. She has a attitude of a 13 yr old:( Now she is resorting to becoming and wanting to be treated as a baby to get teh attention because she sees her sister get attention. One thing you can try is more one on one with wil. Maby your husband can take him somewhere in where will decides where and make it where onece every 2-4 weeks its his day. he deicdes where you guys are goign and you amke it his day. and maby as hard as it is you try to have some more one on one with him when you can... as i know its hard being your the moma nd havign to be with the new one more than hubby! my sil has been doign this and she says it has helped her bigtime and her attitude is gettign better:)

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: I know what you're going through. My Wil had a really hard time transitioning into having a new baby brother in the house. One on one time was/is so important. When the baby naps, be sure and make that special time for just you and Will. Make a big deal about it, repeat to him that it's just the two of you, no baby. I know that naptime is probably time you like to get things done around the house (it was for me), but just let it go and show Will that you're focused on him. My Wil is really into board games, so I often sit down with him, get down to his level and get into a game. We do crafts together, preschool workbooks, coloring, bake cookies - he is so proud of doing things he knows Wesley can't do. Even just turning on lights for me when I ask, bringing me a diaper, or closing the door...Giving them that confidence to "help out" really does benefit you all.

boyohboyohboy replied: caleb was older when Jake was born, but he went thru the same things, he was able to tell us later what he was feeling though, and he said what had bothered him most was the fact that I went to the hosp over night, and he was very worried that I would die there, he didnt really understand about the c section although we had talked about that mommy was having a baby..he just knew that i was having surgery and that I would be home, but in his little mind there was something wrong and I was gone.
maybe he is just feeling the anxiety of everything right now.
I also know how hard it is to find that special time alone, we go thru that even now..but I have to let the house and laundry go something, even when I know it needs it, because I know caleb needs that attention.
everytime his behavior starts like you are describing its usually that he isnt getting what he needs from me..

We cont. with the grounding though, we still take away his fav things so he knows that this isnt acceptable and I keep encouraging him to use his words and tell me how he feels..I also have asked before if he feels a little left out with the new kids in the house, and he will say yes..and we can talk about how special he is to me, and that there is always room for him.
so you think he might also be a little mad at you for bringing home the baby and then putting him in your room and to him it might seem like you favor the baby because he gets so much of your time..instead of being mad at the baby he is mad at you?
maybe when dh is home you can have him take the baby and you two can watch a movie cuddled together or maybe you and he can sleep on the couch together? something that puts you in more contact with him just so he can remember you love him just as much...I guess what I mean is with more then just words..if that makes sense?