Honest question...

mummy2girls wrote: And i need a honest answer. Why is it that a couple...one who wishes the GF miscarries, and did not want the child , and the other that smoked nicotine cigarettes and wacky tobaccy while pregnant get a healthy baby boy, but a person that looks after herself while pregnant, does what she is suppose to do, wont drink smoke or be around smokers have a very ill child that dies?

I have been wondering this all day.

I talked to marcus's sister( selby) and she said she doesnt understand it either, we have the dumb ones that get lucky but then there are us that try and do everythinga nd then tragedy happens... I dont get it!

Ok im off my now

Maddie&EthansMom replied: Shelly, I certainly wish I knew the answer to that question.

Mommy2Isabella replied: I wish there was an answer. My sister used drugs her whole pregnancy and her baby is FINE. Here we tried to do everything right with Isabella, and she has apnea, strep, ear infections. It doesn't compare to what you are going thru but I know where you are coming from. I wish there was an answer... all I can offer is HUGS

A&A'smommy replied: I also wonder the same thing... especially when I see stupid parents!!

mummy2girls replied: i think this is bugging me alot and hurting because aron has a healthy son , born in June and on a sunday. My jordan was born in June and on a sunday... and he was very ill

Miranda1127 replied: i don't have an answer for you but more of an observation. while the "good" parents seem to go through more strenuous circumstances while raising their dc's it comes with it's rewards. in the end know that your child will be stronger, better developed, and ultimately a more successful productive member of society.... b/c of the hard times and the strength they seen fly through them

keep strong and you will raise the strength that will overcome (and soon you will begin to see that strenght in your dd)

gr33n3y3z replied: I wish I knew but it sucks

lisar replied: I understand your point. Raygen spent 2 weeks in the NICU but someone I know did crack, and cocaine while pg with twins and guess what they were just fine. I dont get it either.

Danalana replied: I wonder about it too...in fact, it has plagued my thoughts a lot lately. I told Richard I was thinking of developing a drug problem, because drug addicts seem to have babies by the buttloads Of course, I'm kidding...about ME doing drugs, that is. The only thing that helps me is that God has a bigger plan than my eyes can see or my heart can understand. I definitely struggle with bitterness, though. Sometimes life doesn't seem fair at all.

Twelve Volt Man replied: In August of 2004, my wife and I lost our daughter just 10 days before she was due to be born. She was delivered stillborn, and it was the hardest thing I've ever been through. I took some time off of work, but when I went back, I found myself seething with anger at the worthless crack-addicted prostitutes who seem to have no trouble having healthy babies. They don't appreciate the gift of children, and end up ruining their kids' lives. I don't understand it.

ZandersMama replied: I wonder this daily, when Zavier is having problems, why when I did everything right he has SO many issues but the girl up the road who smoked dope and took pills and drank her entire pregnancy had a 9 lb healthy baby.........

maybe God knows that it takes a special person, a caring person to handle a sick child or a child with special needs. It takes a strong person to lose a child and find the strength to continue. That may be why we are givin the special ones. The ones who wont take care of the child inside definitely arent going to take care of them on the outside. Those children need to be strong to survive from the start if thats what they have to live with. Yet our babies need to feel loved, special and we are strong enough people to do that. However long or brief they are here, our little miricles all know they are loved.

mummy2girls replied:
oh i agree whole heartadely. That brought tears to my eyes!

i guess im just sour because i cant seem to keep healthy sons and he gets a healthy one and he didnt even want him!

ZandersMama replied:
I know, that drives me nutty to. It hurts to see someone else have what you long for and not want it or appreciate it.

lisar replied:
You made me cry.... Well put.

lovemy2 replied: I think Shelly that if there were answers to questions like this the world would be a whole lot better place

I am sorry that you have been dealt the hand that you were dealt but this is where you have to gather up the strength and courage to focus on the things you do have - which you do very well

lovemy2 replied:
WOW - I didn't know that - I imagine in your profession going back to work and seeing what you see had to have been gut wrenching....I do maintain that old saying - that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger