I had a selfish thought and now I feel bad

youngmomofone wrote: I know that being a mom we put the needs of our children first over our own, and I do that ALL the time, but I had a selfish thought that put my needs above hers.

The last two weeks my dd and I have been sick. We had colds last week so I couldn't go to gym and then she was home for a couple days herself. Well, on Monday morning I was excited to get up so I can get her to school so I can go to the gym and work out since I missed all last. Well, she had what I thought was pink eye so I was like ok and kept her home. All Monday I called the hospital here on post to get an appointment and they are full so the nurse tells me to call back on Tuesday and if there are no appts she would send us off post. Well there weren't any on Tues and my daughter got worse with a fever and refused to eat so I called the nurse back and we had an appt yesterday afternoon.

I gave her her meds last night after we got them and decided to keep her home today to give the meds time to kick in. All morning she was fine, bouncing off the walls, me saying I should have taken her to school. Well, that was short lived as she kept coughing even with cough meds to the point where she would throw up. She did it two times and then was fine the rest of the day. Well I put her to bed an hour ago and she did it again not long after so she isnt well enough to go to school yet and for a moment I actually wanted to cry as I missed another week of gym time then I felt bad for thinking of myself and snapped out of it.

With dh being deployed I don't get much time alone so I am feeling a little frustrated and now guilty because I was feeling that way.

redchief replied: Don't feel like you were selfish in thinking about that! We all need a little time to us. I bless you and your family for the sacrifices you're all making.

Nina J replied: Its not bad to want to do things for yourself. You need to. It can be hard finding a balance beween personal time and family time. The majority of my time is spent with the family, but I try to take time out reguarly. Even if it is just going shopping on a Thursday night after the kids are in bed and dh is watching tv or something (Thursday is late night shopping here).

PrairieMom replied: You are not alone. I have a hard enough time when DH is at work, and he comes home every night. Hang in there.

MommyToAshley replied: I can't even imagine what it's like not to have your DH home with you. You are doing it all... and a pretty darn good job, I might add. It's tough to have a sick kid when you have help, but doing it all yourself must be exhausting. Don't feel bad for having thoughts of what it would be like to escape for just a moment. I have those thoughts every now and then.

There is one time that really sticks in my mind. I was driving in the car and I had a headache. Ashley was in the back just talking away. I remember thinking to myself that I would love to have just five minutes of peace and quiet. Then, out of the blue, Ashley says to me, "Mom, I love you. You are the best Mom in the world." Talk about guilt trip.

I hope your daughter feels better.

sparkys2boys replied: Don't feel bad, every person desrves some down time. And with you dh being gone you have alot on your plate.

lisar replied: Dont feel selfish all Mommies need some "ME" time. I know I do.

Boo&BugsMom replied: I can totally see where you are coming from, even though I don't have a husband who is gone a lot. Kudos to you though for doing the right thing. You know how many parents I have had to deal with who would send their kids to me sick or cover their symptoms up with cold medicine...parents who are even home from work or can easily stay home??? You deserve a pat on the back and a big hug. I hope you get your alone time soon.

youngmomofone replied: THanks everyone im glad to see that I didnt come out sounding like a horrible person. She's 100% better and my mom called me and asked if she can take her for the weekend so shes over in Tx until Tuesday afternoon as she has no school Mon or Tues. I talked to my mom earlier and asked how dd was feeling and she said she's perfect so I'm relieved that she really was well enough to go to my moms.

Dh has been gone almost a year now and has about a month left so he'll be home soon!

Nina J replied: In time for Christmas! I bet you can't wait to see him again...I'd be counting down the minutes.

youngmomofone replied: Trust me I am

CantWait replied:
Ditto. Being a military wife I can totoally relate with how you're feeling.

BabyOwen427 replied: I think there's several military wives here. We all know what you're going through. Hang in there. I think the last few weeks before he comes home are the longest. And then the first two weeks he's home is the hardest, trying to adjust back to family life. Good luck.

Calimama replied: It's a normal feeling. I always felt guilty leaving Miabella with a babysitter when DH was deployed. She already had one parent gone. It got better though and I realized that it's okay to need help and to want to do things for yourself occasionally.