I have to vent

Ellie wrote: I went to Super Wal-Mart last night. I almost never go to that store because I get angry about somethign every time. But I needed some random things that you can only get at Wal-Mart or make several trips.

Well, last night, there were HUGE lines at all 5 registers they had open. I got in a line behind 4 other carts and grabbed an Us Weekley to thumb through while I waited. After 10 minutes our line had not moved at all. So I look up and the lady checking out is getting her WIC food. She's arguing with the cashier about something. The manager came up and they settled it. She paid for the rest of her groceries with a lone star card (food stamps in Texas)

Now, I have no problem with people receiving WIC. It's a great program for mom's and kids. But this woman had three kids, all under about 6 and was about 8 months pregnant! I just cannot fathom have four 4 kids (especially all so small) but why would you intentionally have more kids if you can't take care of the ones you already have?

mckayleesmom replied:
I wouldn't be quick to judge...You don't know when that family fell on hard times...She might have already been pregnant and her husband got laid off or what not.

TheOaf66 replied: if it is a situation where she is using the system to her advantage but if it is the guy bailed or whatever than I am glad there are programs like that.

Ellie replied: Maybe but you should be able to go a few months on your savings before having to receive both WIC and food stamps. If you can't, then maybe you should stop having kids!

mckayleesmom replied: You don't know there financial situation. They might have been living well going paycheck to paycheck and haveing plenty to provide for their children, pay their bills etc....She is 8 months pregnant, so she is probably not working. You can go through your savings very fast when you have 4 kids and no money comming in. I have 2 kids, provide well for them. We live paycheck to paycheck in order for me to stay home. We do have a few extras here and there, but not much. If my husband lost his job...I would be standing in line right behind that lady.

mckayleesmom replied:
A couple months? You said she was 8 months pregnant...Thats a long time to go without a paycheck if she wasn't working at the time she got pregnant....Like I said..You don't know the time frame. Its easy to say that, but you really don't know the circumstances.

Bee_Kay replied: After my DH and I had "our" boy and girl, we decided to stop having children. Even when we were in our early 20's, we looked FAR ahead in the future. We took into consideration, Christmas expenses, proms, grad parties, college costs, weddings, grandchildren, ect.

We simply made the responsible choice to not have more children than what we could comfortably afford.

But, I do have a question for you.

How do you know that the mother and/or father of this family wasn't recently laid off from their jobs? It happens every single day. There are millions of families that struggle to make it paycheck to paycheck.

Boo&BugsMom replied:
Savings?!?!? What's that!?!? We need to be realistic. Not every situation is the same.

Kaitlin'smom replied: I agree you dont know what happend, now if she is one who is abusing the system then yes I would be mad right with you. But what if something just happened a few months ago and they (or she) had no other choise?

Boo&BugsMom replied:
My thoughts exactly! This has happend to both me and my Dh within 6 months of each other two years ago! Not a pretty time that was. I know there are people who use the system to sit on their lazy butts, but it's those people who cause this kind of stigma for others who really need it.

Bee_Kay replied: Another thing..... besides the possibility of her (or her dh) losing a job. It crossed my mind that maybe one of the children (or either of the parents for that matter) could be (or had been) suffering an illness?
Cancer affects every walk of life. The bills from cancer treatment are astronomical (my stepmom had breast cancer)

Quite a few years ago, my son was in a bicycle/vehicle accident. Over the course of less than a week, the medical bills skyrocketed to approx $30,000.00.
guess what? neither insurance wanted to pay the bills. guess who had to pay it? yep, we did. fortunately, we had the resources to cover the bills...... and thank god, that we finally settled it with the insurance companies so we were reimbursed.


I agree, shouldn't be so quick to judge.
(but, ITA, people intentionally abusing the system is a completely different story).

TheOaf66 replied:
I just wanted to comment on your avatar, I am quite excited for football season as well.

Boo&BugsMom replied:
Honey, no thread highjacking!!! Tisk tisk!

C&K*s Mommie replied: I could not agree more with each of you guys, about being less judgemental since no one knows the true degree of their personal situation. Bravo!

CantWait replied: Savings??? WTH is that. My husband is in the military and makes decent money, up until a couple months ago, I worked full time and the only thing we have are our mutual funds. Still not enough to live off of for very long.

Just to add, I believe their are a couple people here on WIC, not to single anyone out, but does that make them a bad person.

Shame on you for being so quick to judge.

Kat replied: Interesting that some on here are chiding Ellie about being judgemental regarding a situation she knows little about, when they do just that on the thread about the Duggar family.

mckayleesmom replied:
The Duggar family chose to air their family dynamics on national television...and we judged based on that. Ellie didn't know the lady she was talking about...just what she saw....There is a difference.

CantWait replied:
Well welcome to PC.

People can have their own opinions. It's very easy to do so when you advertise your life on t.v. Those that have watched the show, can make their own opionions on what is right for them or not.

Someone at the grocery store whom hasn't willfully shared their life with you doesn't deserve to be judged based on the fact that we don't know what their situation is.

That is the difference.

Kat replied: Not really - it's still being judgemental. Seeing a snippet of their life on a TV show hardly means you know the entire situation.

skinkybaby replied: I was thinking the same thing, Kat. Some of you were quick to assume that the Duggars lived off of the government and were harsh about it. Interesting.

My2Beauties replied: You know - I was on WIC when I first had DD and both me and my DH worked but we weren't making a whole lot of money. Now granted I didn't get any other help and I got off WIC when Hanna was about 6-7 months old because I got a new job making more money but...it was there for me when I needed it and I didn't hesitate to use it. We both worked and are the complete opposite of lazy. I was working 40+ hours a week and DH was slaving away roofing at that time. We've since both started new jobs and would not qualify for anything like that and wouldn't try as we are more financially set now - BUT you are definitely way to quick to judge this family!

Kaitlin'smom replied:
sorry I agree I LOVE NFL and happy I get to watch my FAVOIRTE teem AGAIN

C&K*s Mommie replied: Not using contraception could be a part of their religious practices. Who knows?

It could have been a conscious choice to have small children close in age, you cannot sit there and say that she cannot provide well for them because of that. If those kids have a roof over their heads, food in their bellies, and a decent place to sleep at night.. frankly she is doing just fine. Without another person coming in to judge her for getting some form of assistance. '

Who knows how long she had even been on food stamps? You, nor I know for sure. It could be temporary situation, long enough to stabilize the family and get them back on track, and leave the door open for another family that needed it as temporary as they did.

They could have been a family that was misplaced by Katrina. Slowly regaining their footing, while taking care of their children. Unplanned pregnancies occur all the time. It is no secret what can prevent them, but they still happen.

So instead of passing judgement on her, when you do not fully know her situation, step back and recognize that she is probably trying her best with what she can do.

My2Beauties replied: I just want to add I am totally against people mooching off the system, so in no way shape or form am I saying it's ok to be on welfare and stay on welfare and not do something with yourself instead of continuing to have children so you get more assistance. Everyone on this board knows from past threads that I can't stand a moocher off of my tax dollars. BUT...again I want to re-iterate it's there for people who really need it. If someone is working, trying to earn an honest living and getting some type of assistance because they have a child and they just are having a really hard time making ends meet, that is fine. This could be the case with this family and I think maybe we should sit back and not judge people for what "seems to be" their situation when we have no idea. We had a thead on here not too long ago about someone who refused to work and her husband didn't make enough to support them so she received gov't assistance - that is welfare abuse. But this poor girl might have worked 40 hours a week and still needed some help.

Maddie&EthansMom replied:
So was that the purpose of this thread? I'm just wondering b/c I see you have 2 posts and Ellie has 5.

I also want to mention that you do have a point. Except the situations are quite different between the woman at Wal Mart and the Duggar family. The lesson to be learned (if the purpose of this thread was to teach a lesson) is that we should not pass judgement on anyone or any family, period. We are all entitled to our opinions and do have the right to voice our opinions. Thank you for voicing yours. I do hope you stay around and become an active member of PC and not just to start or reply to controversial threads. If you do, you will see that our members have more to offer and this is a great community. There is a lot to be learned from others.

mckayleesmom replied:

Kat replied: I just started reading this board, and found the contradictions between the 2 threads interesting. The low post counts is simply a coincidence.

Everyone certainly has a right to their opinion - I just think it's a bit hypocritical to be judgemental of one situation, and chide someone else for doing the same in another.

luvbug00 replied: .

The Duggers were on bloody national TV! THEY put themselfs out to the public and we are giving the reaction we got from their MANY tv apperances.

The woman in the store hasn't put sherself out and is simpley trying to feed her family THAT is the differance.

skinkybaby replied: So? You're making awfully big assumptions yourself.

Kat replied: And I disagree with you.

My2Beauties replied: Aimee couldn't have said it better. I think you two are trying to stir up trouble!

Ellie replied: Sorry but I think I do have a right to judge people who live off the assistance that WE pay for. Not only is she on WIC but on food stamps. They have 3 kids already. If you are living paycheck to paycheck with three, why would you even leave the option open to have another?

Sorry, but until we were able to have the money to put away for future college funds and emergencies, Josh and I didn't even try to have kids. You can just not have sex if you are unable to use birth control for religious reasons.

And I don't get why how many posts I have has anything to do with being angry at someone living off the taxes that we as a family pay. I worked full time until Ginger was born but now I stay at home. My husband works hard so that I can stay at home and if he were to lose his job, we'd be able to pay our bills for several months. In the meantime, one of us would get a job at Walmart if need be.

luvbug00 replied: there is NOTHING wrong with working at walmart!!! you make is sound soo bad.

They have the right to have as many children as they want, as do the Duggers but it's the children who will sufer if they are lacking attention.



what loving coupple doesn't have sex! your being rediculas.

My2Beauties replied:
Again youa re assuming they were living paycheck to paycheck already when she got preggo - they might have been very well off, maybe a tragic accident occurred and her DH is disabled, maybe one of her children has a disability that can't be seen and costs large amounts of money for medical treatments. Maybe her DH or herself lost their job and this is the only way they can afford food right now. Should their children starve??? Again - you have passed judgment on them! I didn't pass judgment on the Duggar family - it was what it was, kids doing chores, parents spouting at rules as everyone said who say the show. You just saw this girl paying for her groceries in the line, you didn't watch a documentary of her life! So who are you to say she is mooching off of society???

Kat replied:

You're absolutely right. How insightful of you.

I had no idea that I was not allowed to voice my opinion until I reached a certain post count. Please tell me what that magic number is, so that I can keep my opinions to myself until then.

mckayleesmom replied:


Very well said LeaAnn.

Maddie&EthansMom replied: This thread is no longer productive. Let's move on, okay?