I need some honest advice
My2Beauties wrote: OK Brian's friends invited him to go to a football game Saturday night in Columbus OH, which is roughly a 4-5 hour trip from here. Two of the guys are leaving Friday night to go there and party that night. Brian was invited but when he asked me to go he wasn't leaving until Saturday morning and coming home Sunday morning. I don't want him to go for obvoius reasons, I don't like being home by myself and again I am stuck at home. I feel bad though, I have tried to get several of my friends to do something with me that night but to no avail, I know that if I got my friends to do something wtih me I wouldn't care if he went  but if I was stuck at home I would care Is that selfish? Also I don't like the fact that he will be partying Saturday night God knows where with his SINGLE buddies!  Am I wrong should I let him go? What would you guys do? He never does stuff like this and I know deep down in my heart he wants to go and will be pissed at me but on the outside he is acting like he doesn't care (however it's not saturday yet and I'm not looking forward to "I could be at the game right now" all day long)!  HELP!
A&A'smommy replied: Probably the best thing to do for your relationship would be to let him go, its not selfish of you to not want to be home by yourself (well without him) that is normal I would feel that way too. But I just read down and I see that he will be partying saturday night, can you not go to and maybe pamper yourself at the hotel and then that night go party with them? That is what I would do. Maybe you will get some better advice from the other girls. But if it was me there would be NO partying without me!!!
Kaitlin'smom replied: well you alrady said it was okay sat morning to sun morning so stick with that. He needs the time out just as you do. I know what its like to feel like you have no life or friends any more, I have the same thing not having very many RL firends to do things with. HUmm 4-5 hours to Columbus then its about 45 mins to me...maybe we should plan a meeting some where inbetween....
My2Beauties replied:
Oh honey if I could go I would, but that is OUT. His friends would never let him live that down if I went with the 4 of them and he wouldn't go if I said I wanted to go, I guess it's a guy thing! 
My2Beauties replied:
Actually I told him I didn't want him to go and he is acting like it's no big deal right now, but like I said come Saturday he'll be whining and moaning the whole day and maybe even be in a bad mood! I am not going at all, I'll be stuck at home by myself! Does that change anyone's answers? 
ediep replied: I also hate being home alone, but I would probabaly tell Dh to go. My Dh has to travel for work sometimes and i hate it. I try to have my sister or mom come over to hang out with me and Jason when DH is away. I also try to stay busy with Jason during the day
TANNER'S MOM replied: Hey girl! I know how lonely that house feels when they are gone. I know about the trouble you have been having too. Maybe this time he should just say no. Last week you guys had to have a talk and work things out about you needing more time with him. Maybe he needs to stay home this weekend and make plans with you.
I think we both need to make some couple friends , you know so we can all go and do things together. Because I really hate it when he goes off w./ his single friends to chase women.lol Even though we all know he just watches 
Kaitlin'smom replied: I hate being alone to, espically if he gets to go out but when I try its a big deal (well thats another story) but in most cases I let him go, I am probably to easy going in that manner. It truly never bothered me before, and its just now starting to bother me since he seems to want to do what he wants when he wants, with no thougth to a little girl craving his attention, but again I digress. If you have told him no then let it be and if he whines then ask if you really wnated to go why did you ack/say it was fine you were not going. anyway maybe you can make plans as a family and that way you both get to have fun.
coasterqueen replied: Well my advice would be to let him go. It really isn't his fault you don't have people to go out with like he does. I don't mean that in a snotty tone...just that you can't be mad at him for wanting to continue his relationships. As my DH always tells me "you can't tell me what to do...I am a human being and an adult".  I do try to tell him when something like that is bothering me and I let him know I fully expect to get my "free night" to myself as well and he trys to honor that. The thing is I don't have a lot of people to go out with on my own so my free night usually is just playing on the computer by myself w/o anyone bothering me.
Boys r us replied: I agree, let him go. You can't pentalize him b/c he has friends who are available on that night to go and have fun with, simply because your friends aren't available. As for the hotel thing and going out with the guys, my question to you is, Aren't you two getting married? I would hope that with as serious of a commitment as marriage is that you have enough trust in your heart to know that he will be faithful to you. Just because his friends are single doesn't mean he thinks he is!
I'm not trying to bash you or anything hun, I just think it would be silly for him to miss out because of the reasons you've listed. JMO!
Jamison'smama replied: ahh, OSU-Michigan weekend--crazy time here in Columbus--that's where I live--want me to spy on him? 
I would let him go---but I would have him check in
jcc64 replied: LET HIM GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My dh is a bass player in a band, and he often has gigs at parties and bars and festivals and all sorts of fun places like that. Does it bum me out sometimes- you bet! Do I resent being stuck at home with the kids while he's out having fun- absolutely.
But, as Karen's dh pointed out, you're not his mommy, you don't have the right to prevent him from doing things he wants to do. Of course, this is all predicated on the assumption that he allows you free time away from the family to do whatever it is you want/need to do. Even if it doesn't seem as spectacular as a football w/e with the boys- pick a date(s) and go do something- go to the mall, go to a movie, go skiing, biking, go to the library for god's sake, go do whatever makes you happy. You don't need a huge social network to have a good time.
I think the key to a good marriage is respecting your spouse's right to maintain his/her own identity while simultaneously respecting each other's feelings. If you try to prevent him from doing this, he will resent it, trust me, and he will not forget it. I know it's no fun to be alone, but try to make the best of it. Rent a dvd, make popcorn, order takeout, whatever, it'll go fast, and just think how grateful he'll be when he gets back.
Kaitlin'smom replied:
yep that I agree with that
coasterqueen replied:
You know Jeanne...I didn't want to listen to him when he said that to me last weekend.  I wanted him to do something and I couldn't convince him to do it so I said I was going to take something away from him (I can't remember what it was) and so he let me know I'm not his mommy. Little stinker was right. I hate it when they are right sometimes. 
Boys r us replied: Funny Karen..this morning..I was struggling getting Rick out of the bed on time..and so I opened the bathroom door and yelled at him to GET UP NOW and he just groaned, but didn't budge..I said, Rick get up right now or I'm gonna go get your dad! LOL
Maybe we think we're their moms b/c they act like our kids!LOL
My2Beauties replied:
Gosh your post made so much sense to me! I feel like a selfish brat!
Nichole....your post made sense too! Yes I trust him totally without a doubt Brian would never cheat on me, I know he woulnd't (I'm too good of a catch..ROFLMAO  ) no seriously I trust him, I have issues when it comes to being alone is my sole problem. I am also jealous of him (as Jolene mentioned in one of her posts about Barry), I am jealous that my friends do not like to go out as much as his does and their all stuck up their men's butts or that they have to work weekends and his are always ready for a night on the town) I love to party and go out with my girls but since kids they don't have the babysitter availability like I do or they have stupid men that run their lives!! Which in a sense is what it sounds like I am doing to Brian......woe is me! I called him and told him that I will probably go on and let him go...and then he says baby it really isn't a big deal if you don't want me to go I won't! Yeah right, after the fact huh
Boys r us replied: Good for you!! you know, one of the most valuable things I've learned in my life is to CHERISH the time I have alone and become accepting of alone time..as a good thing.
I used to not like to be alone either, but I've learned it's good. After all, you have to keep in touch with yourself too. You r world is constantly changing, you're a mom about to become a wife, you have a fairly new job...take a night to become reaquainted with YOU!
Send Hannah to your mom's or whomever woudl have watched her if your friends had wanted to go out..and you do something for YOU!! Even if it's just sitting in front of the bube tube with no one to bother you! Rent some chick flicks!
You could even have a friend over who has a child, but no sitter and watch some girly movies! this is what my girlfriends and I do when we don't have sitters!
MomToMany replied: You got some great advice, and I agree you should let him go.
favre4fan replied: I would let him go but I would definately specify that you get a get away free card!!
kimberley replied: i would let him go. unless you had previous plans with him or something then there really is no good reason for him not to. as for going out with single friends, trust him. he has a mind of his own. and your reunion will surely be sweet 
mama3x replied: Because DH and I are football nuts, I would probably let him go so I would advise the same thing of you. Well technically I wouldn't "let him" go, he's the boss in the house...but that's another matter.
I have to be honest though and would probably sulk and be a pain in the butt up until the moment he left b/c I'd be jealous I couldn't go too.
But I'd end up on the internet or watching something I want to watch on tv or just do something I usually don't when everyone's home.
Let us know what happens!
Josie83 replied: I agree with the others, even tho its hard for you I'd let him go. He might end up resenting you if you don't - you have to trust him! xx
Lollie replied: You not being sefish but the Ladies are right.
It may be tough for you to let him go for obvious reasons but this is the part where trust plays a huge role.Even tho his buddies are single,you have to trust that your man knows that he isn't.
If you can,you should get some of your friends and go out and do something.
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