Leaving the board...gl everyone

GavinsMommy wrote: I've just about had it w/ message boards and though I know it wasn't meant in a harmful way...something has really ticked me off and I don't want to come back here...

Let me just say that I am in no way calm about my son falling off the couch by any means. My heart just about stopped when I woke up and saw him on the floor. He couldn't have rolled a few feet...he would have had to hit the ground and then roll...which isn't likely...

I'm just sick of people making it out like I don't care about Gavin...Jerimiah dogged me that night that he was crying for an hour and I didn't RUSH him to the ER. Babies cry sometimes! And I knew he had the thrush...

I guess I'm just a bad mother...

Anyway good luck everyone w/ everything...I don't mean to sound hormonal, but I just hate it when assumptions are made about me...

MomToMany replied: I'm sorry, but no one said you don't care about Gavin. I'm sure you love him like any other parent loves their child. There's no reason for you to just up & leave the board because of one reply.

jcc64 replied: I'm certain my post is the one to which you refer. I'm sorry you inferred that I believed you are or were a bad mom.(which is not what I intended) The thing about message boards is, if you ask for opinions, you're gonna get them, and you may not always agree with them.
I have learned much about myself from this and other boards, and it isn't always what I wanted to hear or know. I hesitated before I posted that message, believing you might misunderstand what I had to say. And yet, I had hoped that you would receive it in the spirit in which it was intended. And that was- to hopefully point out something you hadn't yet thought of yourself that may be of some help to you in your future as a mom. I'm sorry you weren't able to see it that way. Good luck to you whatever you decide- I've enjoyed getting to know you.

coasterqueen replied: I don't think anyone said you were a bad mother, either. I agree with Jeannine's post on the other thread, but I don't think she was intending to be harsh.

I will agree with her, especially on the part of you saying Gavin's slept in the crook of your arms for 4 weeks now and hasn't fallen off the couch yet. Believe me, don't tempt fate.

It happens and things happen you don't think will happen. I know.

((HUGS)) and I hope you reconsider.

GavinsMommy replied: I understand what you were trying to do...it was the whole..."honestly I find your attitude about him falling off the couch a bit troubling..." or whatever you said...that's what got me. Like you were implying that I didn't care about him falling. What am I expected to do??? Put a bunch of sad faces on my post or type in all capitals to show that I am upset that it happened?

When I asked for opinions I didn't ask for suggestions on how to keep him from falling...that is just common sense. I was asking how he could have gotten so far on the floor...whether they thought it was Jerimiah or just that he scooted that far by pushing w/ his feet. I wasn't asking for parenting advice.

The first time he fell off the couch was a few weeks ago and that was totally not my fault. What parent of a two week old thinks...Oh...I need to put a pillow there because he is going to roll over...not any that I know. Two week old babies don't roll over...or at least that's what I thought. Now I know...now I put a pillow there.

I am an extremely light sleeper and I wake up to every little noise he makes. I know myself and I know him and all I'm saying is I didn't believe there was a need for pillows in the bed yet. I have no explanation for what happened but I guess I'm just not a very good learner or I would have learned from before...

True..message boards are basically a flood of opinion...and that's welcome, when asked for it...but I'm sure everyone knew that read it that I wasn't asking for opinion on how to keep it from happening again...I was asking for opinions on how in the world he got that far.

Anyway...I need to stay off the net anyway, I need to spend as much time as possible w/ Gavin...

Kaitlin'smom replied: I am sorry your leaving, and sorry you took some of our post the wrong way. I can relate anytime Kaitlin has fallen I fell terrible like I should have been able to prevent it, that i was just not careful enough. Accidents do happen and it does not make you a bad mother, infact I think your a great mother, taking nessary steps to ensure safty and happyness. Best of luck in what ever you decide.

Mommy2BAK replied: I really don't want to get in the middle of anything here, but I just want to say that there are NO bad mothers or fathers here. Anyone who spends their spare time away from their child on a board talking about their child, is far from a bad parent. I think you are very corageous to even ask for advice, once, Blakely fell off my bed and the ONLY person I had the guts to tell was my mom. (I guess that's no secret anymore, ).

But I really hate to see you go. But if thats what you fell like you need to do then so be it. You will be missed!

DansMom replied: For what it's worth, Daniel fell off the couch when he was an infant too---long before he could roll, and I thought I had him well situated. He was probably about the same age as Gavin. I think I was using the bathroom (I can't remember now), and I heard this "thunk". I was so distraught, horrified and surprised by the whole experience. He landed on his tummy, and fortunately there was carpet. I called the ER pediatrician on call, but they told me from my description they weren't too worried and what to look for. After examining my arrangement on the couch, I determined that he actually "launched" off over time by repeated straightening of his legs. He couldn't roll, but he was always stretching and kicking, and could rotate and advance incrementally that way. It's possible Gavin worked his way across the floor a little at a time just by wiggling and straightening. What a funny kid for not complaining during that process! I'm glad he's okay.

I hope you stay, by the way!

3xsthefun replied: I must have missed your post about Gavin falling off the couch. I have to say if you are a bad mother so am I. Both of my girls have fallen off of the couch when they were infants also. Yeah maybe I should have learned from Kaitlynn falling off the couch. But I thought that Maegan would be ok for just a second and she proved me wrong. It is very scary when they fall! But I know all parents make mistakes.

I am really sorry that you are leaving and I wish you would not. Please come back when you feel up to it!

A&A'smommy replied: I have to say I don't think your a bad parent I think you love Gavin very much and we all make mistakes both of those times were accidents when Alyssa was tiny I dropped her we were sitting on the bed and she rolled off my legs I cried for hours about that and another I almost sat on her and cried for hours about that one too. Those things happen to us it makes us more aware we live and learn...

Kirstenmumof3 replied: Well I'm sorry you feel that you need to leave. That is your choice. I certainly enjoyed getting to know you and seeing the pictures of your beautiful baby. Good Luck to you, I wish you all the best!

Allyson&Patrick'sMom replied: I am sorry you are leaving...but what I have learned from Parents.com is that it is a message board and you can not tell how someone is coming across by typing. Ask any of the people here who were members there...they will agree. Good Luck to you and that baby of yours is a cutey!

Doctor_Mom replied: Hey you can't leave! I'm new here and you've got lots of pics and sigs so you are going to come in handy for this incompetent newbie!

In all seriousness though, I don't know the story about why you want to leave, but I'm thinking it's really hard to translate meaning behing words on a screen, and super easy to take things much harsher than they were intended. Maybe step back from the boards for a bit and then come back feeling refreshed and ready to help out us newbies. Doesn't seem like anyone wants you to leave

All the best!

aspenblue1 replied: I am sorry you are leaving. I missed the post about Gavin falling off the couch.

Josie83 replied: I wish you would reconsider Lauren. Noone on here thinks your a bad mother. Maybe you could do with some time away and come back in a few days? I would miss you around here. Please don't take things personally . . . hope to see you around soon. If not, I'll miss you and wish you good luck with Gavin and Jeremiah xx