Letter her choose? - too early

Mommy2Isabella wrote: Alright guys, I feel like I have NO CLUE what I am doing, but in all honesty I DON'T HAVE A CLUE! I have never had a 1 year old before! LOL

So, is it too early to let her choose between two things? Or let her choose what she will wear?

Like for lunch letting her choose her snack, you know fruit or veggies? Simple this or that decisions.

Also, as far as clean up time, is it too early to have her help?

If she THROWS something out of anger during the day she has to pick it up and bring it to me and she is told we don't throw things... so she knows how to pick things up...

THANKS FOR THE HELP!!!

moped replied: Well this is only my opinion, but yes i think she is too young - I don't think Jack understood that stuff really for quite a while after 12 months......I think you should pick her clothes, dress her etc. And you should provide her healthy meals and snacks and she can decide if she eats it - IMO!

Boo&BugsMom replied: I'm not really sure to be honest. I think choices are great, it's giving them the control that isn't good, and I dont necessarily think there is an age limit on it. But, like Jen said though, not sure if she'd understand that it is a choice and what choices mean. I guess I would wait until more the 18 month mark, then she'll comprehend the concept of choices more clearly.

luvmykids replied: I agree with Jen and Jennie on the choices, at that age I'm not sure they really understand it's this OR that. But yes, she can help pick up. We started singing the Barney song around that age and they still remember it....Clean up, clean up, everybody clean up. I think you have to start early being specific though, not just "pick up the toys" but "put all the books in the basket" or "put the baby in her bed" type of thing.

My2Beauties replied: I agree, a 12 month old just cannot comprehend and it may make her frustrated.

Our Lil' Family replied: I don't think they understand at that age. I would always test Thomas to see if he understood the "this or that" by asking him two ways. If he didn't understand he'd always choose the last choice. Example: Do you want pancakes or waffles? Waffles....then switch, do you want waffles or pancakes? Pancakes. See? He always just chose the last one mentioned. NOW he does know the difference though (2 1/2) and I do give him more choices.

Calimama replied: I think she's still a bit young for that. Bella will help me put her toys in the toy box but only because she thinks it's a game. But as far as choosing clothes and snacks, she doesn't understand enough to make those choices.

Kentuckychick replied:
I think this is great advice

It's okay to give "choices" but it's how you do it.

I agree that she's a little too young to pick out her clothes (I wouldn't go with that for several more years) with the clothing thing I think most parents switch over because their children have a streak of independence rather than really giving them choices persay. You can encourage some independence early on like putting the shirt halfway on her head and having her help pull it on the rest of the way, having her put her arms in the sleeves, etc... put at her age it's far easier to just get them dressed and be done with it.

As far as choices go with eating. I think it's okay to give choices, but like Jen said, give those choices by putting the healthy foods on her tray (typically a small serving of fruit, veggie, grain and some dairy or protein) at each meal and let her choose which of those she will eat. If you find that she sticks to one or two of the food groups then you may cut those out for a meal or two and give less choices.

As far as cleaning up, it's never too early to start. Make it a game, and have her help. The clean up song is wonderful. She might not understand it now, but the earlier you begin it, the more routine it becomes and the less struggle you'll likely face in the future. If a child is old enough to follow simple comands such as "Pick up the toy. Now bring it to me." Then they are old enough to help with cleanup.

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: Wesley is 15 months and does not understand choices. I put food in front of him and he eats it! As far as cleaning up, he will pickup from time to time but it takes a lot of me showing him how. Making it a fun game, like "let's put the blocks back in the box, see how mommy does it" is the way I do it. But if he doesn't clean up, no big deal to me. They are still really young. Wil is just now getting the hang of these tasks, and he is three.

My3LilMonkeys replied: If she seems interested in clothes I don't see the harm in letting her pick between 2 choices. Brooke has been picking her own clothes - first with choices, now she can pick anything in her drawers (though I do try to guide her towards matching as much as I can) - since about 15 months. It's just something she's always been interested in.

Kentuckychick replied:
Yeah... the nearly 7 year old I nanny for still hasn't quite figured out the whole 'matching' thing yet. Usually I just ignore it and tell her she looks very cute/pretty/sweet... whichever best describes and leave it at that. However, when she came down the other day dressed in a brown and pink 'my mom's a rock star' t-shirt with neon yellow shorts on... I couldn't bite my tongue

You could always try it... maybe lay two shirts out in her room and ask her to pick one, see if she shows any interest at all (that way you're still picking for the most part). But I wouldn't be too surprised if she just doesn't care.

Mommy2Isabella replied: She loves to pick out her shirt, and she will pick one of the two that I lay out and I say Bella pick one and she does. She loves it her face lights up!!

Humm .. thanks for the input guys!

Cece00 replied: Natalie has been able to pick out clothes for a long time now...sometimes I just put her in something but often I let her pick out what she wants to wear, she loves that