MIL is crazy - really!

ilovemybaby wrote: We are having problems with my MIL and her partner, and SIL. We got married in February and we did not invite them to our wedding. MIL had an affair about 3 or 4 years ago and left FIL and moved away to live with her current partner. Then about 2 years ago she moved back to our town when SIL and her husband moved to Aussie. They rent SILs husbands home.
So of course, they found out about the wedding about a week ago and have been harrassing us ever since. We have explained to them why we did not invite them. But we continue to get emails, texts and phone calls from them.
Last night MIL phoned about 10 times. She was yelling and screaming at us over the phone. First Paul. She mentioned Abby and how we said that she leaves small objects and medications lying on the coffee table and that she thinks she shouldn't have to clean up for her and that she should know not to touch (keep in mind we are talking about a 22 month old that doesn't even talk yet - has a 25-30 word vocabulary but only says one word at a time). Last time we were at their house she picked up money and a clip and proceeded to put them into her mouth. We of course stopped her. Then she found a hat pin on the dining room table. Then she picked up half an Asprin (medication) off the coffee table. All that time we were biting our tongues. So anyway, on the phone last night she said that "she would let Abby get cut up by their fan just to prove/make a point". (WOULDN'T THAT BE CLASSED AS CHILD ABUSE? ISN'T IT LIKE SAYING SHE'D LET HER TOUCH THE HEATER OR FIRE IF IT WAS ON/GOING?) Of course, Paul went mad and yelled at her and said she is sick in the head. He hung up on her. Well, she proceeded to ring us about another 8 times and each time hung up on us and then phoned back five seconds or less later. Eventually I picked up the phone and told her that I would call Telecom (the phone company) and the Police if she phoned again. She said she would take me to court for "defermation (sp?) of character and slander". I told her it wouldn't even hold up in court. So she didn't ring again. Then we got a phone call from her when we were in bed. We didn't answer. Then she text us saying that her partner has all our photos of Abby on his harddrive (not sure what she was trying to tell us there) and "get a lawyer, see you in court for slander".

I was originally going to get them trespassed off our property because someone in a dark van (they have one) turned up the other night when we were in bed. Paul looked out the window and they drove off. And because of everything that is going on, we will not be surprised if they turned up here.
I am changing our phone number.
I was going to make a formal complaint with the police about the phone calls but decided not to.
So for now we are changing our phone number and if they come over here we will trespass them.

We are no longer speaking to them or emailing/texting them.
All this because we did not invite them to our wedding.

Cece00 replied: darn, can you say psycho???

BTW as far as I see, you've done nothing along the lines of "Defamation of Character" or "Slander" so I'd brush that off.

My MIL is a royal PIA but she's not THIS crazy...I still dont deal with her, dont let my kids deal with her, and DH very very rarely deals with her.

MyLuvBugs replied: WOW! Psycho much? Have you thought about a restraining order against them? I dont' know if you have such a thing in NZ, but here in the states that would be considered harassment or stalking almost, and you could file a complaint with the police/court that says they are not allowed to call you or come with in X amount of feet from your person or property. Something to look into anyway.

Sorry your having some much trouble with them. It really does sound like they're a little nutty. And JMHO, I'd totally file a complaint against them with the police for the phone calls and alert the phone company. But that's just my opinion.

ilovemybaby replied: Well the reason why she is threatening that is because when SIL emailed us first(BTW I must mention she was saying nasty things to us in that email) I emailed her back and said how we did not invite her to our wedding because Paul wanted his father there and since she had an affair he does not want anything to do with her (we are constantly expected to choose them over him) he wouldn't come to the wedding if we invited her. So I mentioned the affair and brought up a few things she has done in the past (I was mad), how she treated me in the past, and how she doesn't keep small objects and medications etc away from Abby when we visit. I mentioned how her partner is abusive to her and that I don't trust him. I said that we were no longer going to get him to fix our computer because he doesn't seem to know what he is doing.

All these emails and texts have only been between SIL and MIL and her partner. It wasn't like I was going around town telling strangers and people that know her about anything. So I know that if she took it to court she would lose.

ilovemybaby replied:

Yeah that's what we were originally going to do. But since she is threatening to take us to court we decided to just leave it. In their last text message they said "unless you back off". So we are. So if they still do anything then they are the ones that will look really really bad in court. However, if she does come over we will do that. We are already changing our phone number. I was told by Telecom that we would have to pay $48.50 to change it and I said "well I don't see why we should have to pay since we are getting abusive calls" (all the while I was shaking and crying) and she said that's just standard proceedure. My dad said he would pay for it, however he said the same thing... that we shouldn't be paying for it. He should know because he is an ex policeman.
They also know our email address and her partner knows how to send viruses. So we are a little worried. We do have anti-virus software though. But if he was stupid enough to do that I can always send the emails on to XTRA and hopefully they would be able to track them. We can't afford to change our email address (that also costs).

MyLuvBugs replied:
You should look into getting a free email account with Hotmail or yahoo or someone like that. Then just never check the other one anymore. And DEFINATELY save and print out all the emails they're sending you as evidence. Just in case. Does your dad (ex Policeman) have any advice for ya?

jem0622 replied: I am sorry that there is so much bitterness and really bad behavior going on with the inlaws. I think you have to do what is best for you. I would not visit or speak with them for now. We don't marry the inlaws, we marry our spouses!

ilovemybaby replied:
I already have a Hotmail and Yahoo one that they don't know about. The thing is the other one is the one all my family and friends use and I can't just not check it. I guess I could ask them all to use the Hotmail address but if I am not going to use the XTRA one then there is no point paying for it. KWIM And if we don't have it then we don't have internet access. I have no way of blocking their emails so they don't come through. I thought XTRA would be able to do that...

We are keeping all the emails.

Paul spoke to my dad last night so I don't know if he said much. He did say it wasn't probably worth complaining to the police about the phone calls because they didn't threaten to kill us or anything major. But I have to disagree.

ilovemybaby replied:
Exactly! I have always said that. My MIL has interfered from day one and tried to break us up. No one can replace her. *sheesh* When do they finally untie the apron strings? LOL

luvmykids replied: Good lord, I thought my MIL was crazy but yours makes her look angelic! I'm really sorry you're having to deal with all this, must be hard on DH too.

BAC'sMom replied:

Makes mine look like a saint too. But I am still glad she lives hundreds of miles away.

Sorry to hear about your Nut Case.

Crystalina replied:
I'm so sorry that your having problems with your in-laws. Hopefully this gets resolved quickly.

ilovemybaby replied: Yes it is very hard on him. He feels like this is all his fault for not telling them about the wedding and also for giving them our phone number in the first place.

I have changed our number.