My sister is engaged - and I am depressed & stressed out!
amynicole21 wrote: Anyone remember me complaining about my sister's free-loading boyfriend? The one who hasn't worked since March because he's trying to "find himself?" Well, he proposed last weekend.  Of course, he didn't give her a ring because he has no money.  I guess she'll buy that for herself, too.
Anyway, now he has his heart set on a NEW YEAR'S EVE wedding. 2005! ACK~! She's running around trying to figure out how she'll get everything planned in less than 3 months.  And this will be a real wedding - 100 guests, large expensive banquet hall, the works. No rinky-dinky party here. What's the rush? She wants to have a baby ASAP. She's 34.
I'm the matron of honor and am beginning to stress out. She's only been engaged for a little over a week! Not to mention that she lives in Philly, I live in Orlando, and I have no vacation time left since I used it all up for maternity leave.  How is this going to work?!
She's worried that no one will come to a NYE wedding because they'll have other plans. What do you think?
foxyrox replied: I'm new here, so I didn't know your sis' situation but I am agreeing with you...how's this going to work if he doesn't have a job and all? I mean the whole wedding thing can be worked out (people will come to a NYE wedding, I've been to one), but the marriage is what I'm thinking about. It sounds like your sister is going to take on a major load here. I hope it works out. Whew!
I used to live outside of Philly myself...I miss it sometimes.
A&A'smommy replied: awww hun I'm sorry!!! 
kit_kats_mom replied: Well, if she has a late reception and an open bar, people will come to a NYE wedding.They came to ours.  Our bar bill was phenominal! LOL
She needs to get the invites out quickly though so that other plans aren't made.
MyBlueEyedBabies replied: I was the matron of honor at my sister NYE wedding last year. I think they had about 80% attendance and that is including all the people they invited from overseas (probably about 15% of guest list)
Have her send out save the date cards now (like this week) then she can get the invitations ordered and it won't be a stresser that no one knows about it...
As for the FH...sorry you don't like him, hopefully your sister knows what she's doing
Kaitlin'smom replied: sorry this is bringing on stress for you, its never easy when you dont like your siblings future partner. I agree if she is really wanting to do it this NYE then send out the save the date card NOW. So people can mark it on the calander. I hope the new husband to be finds himself fast and gets a job. How old is he?
3xsthefun replied: I'm so sorry, hon.
amynicole21 replied:
HE'S 45 YEARS OLD!
He should have found himself decades ago. 
ediep replied: Oh no! How stressfull for you!!
but I agree, if tis is going to happen this NYE, then she should send out save the date cards and get her invites out, at least 8 weeks before the wedding
any chance you could convince her to have it next year? 
msmzrose replied: It is so hard to be happy for someone when you know what they are doing is wrong. But, you sisters needs you. Be her support and try not to say I told you so when it doesn't work out.....
Maddie&EthansMom replied: Oh geez! What a mess! I'm so sorry, Amy. :friendhug: I really hope he gets his act together. Especially since she is wanting to start a family soon. I will keep her in my thoughts. '
I hope the wedding works out. I've never been to a NYE wedding, but apparently people do go to them if they are planned in advance. 
luvbug00 replied: OH I remember that last post about him...I know this has got to be bittersweet for you because you want to be happy for her but you can't stand him. In my area I think it's a little late for a NYE wedding do they have any other special days comming up that are personal holidays for them?. Kudos if she can do it. But I hope she gets invatitions out ASAP!
jcc64 replied: OK, if he's 45 and he still hasn't "found" himself, maybe he should stop looking. Man.....
redchief replied: I remember your post well. Sorry Amynichole... Sounds like you're being real supportive of your sis though. I'm proud of you, especially knowing how you feel about your future brother-out-law.... errr. In-law.
Kaitlin'smom replied:
 OMG guess its a lost cause, some people are just that way, its basically the root of my oldest sisters problems a DH that does not have a steady job she never know if and when he might get pay check
I am so sorry guess she is blinded by love and she will see it eventually
~Roo'sMama~ replied: I'm sorry Amy! I agree... 45 is a bit old to still be looking for himself. I hope he gets himself in gear soon for your sister's sake!!
3_call_me_mama replied:
LOL JEANNE! that's what I was thinking too:) Amy- hope she can pull it off adn I bet it will be a wonderful time, guests will come especialyl if you have open bar Hope it plans quickly and smoothly 
MommyToAshley replied: Amy... I can imagine all the things you are feeling right now. She should be able to plan the wedding in time...it will be a lot of work, and she may not get her first choices in dresses, places, caterers, etc because many of those things take time and are booked in advance. Maybe that will help convince her to wait until next year, or have a summer weddding.
She's lucky to have a wonderful sister like you that stands by her even when you think she is making a huge mistake. I hope he finds himself soon... it'd be hard to raise a family if you are lost.
coasterqueen replied: Yikes! That does sound like a lot of pressure. Sorry.  Hope she doesn't want a lot of out of town people coming. I couldn't imagine people flying/traveling on New Years (or around that time), especially with children. Ugh! I hope you can get it planned in time and with as little stress as possible.
amynicole21 replied: UPDATE! She has decided thata NYE wedding on such short notice is not the thing to do. She's moved it allllll the way back to February! 
coasterqueen replied:
Oh well that's good. I hope it's not a Valentine's day wedding, though.
Kaitlin'smom replied: oy so what now we are going for valenitines day? guess the good point is it will be a new year and you will have some time off.
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