OMG there's MORE - DH has REALLY stepped in it now

victoire2002 wrote: I didn't see it until now. He left a chalkboard message that says

PLEASE clean the kitchen
Take back overdue video
Move planters from front porch


And on top of my computer I have insurance papers with message instructing me to call the insurance and lab to resolve. He acts like I am his mismanaged employee.

I AM SO ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~CrazieMama~ replied: your DH.

Heather replied: Oh wow what is that about? He needs a good in the head!!!

MommyToAshley replied:

I wouldn't want to be your DH tonight!

Kaitlin'smom replied: Uh oh he better watch out!

KatieLeigh79 replied: *Comfort* Your Hubby and mine could move in together - It seems the more I get worried about John and if he's getting enough BM etc because he seems to still be hungry i get "well we will just stop then it will end all the constant talk of it im getting sick of it" as well as other various things (amazing with all the money he spent, wanting it to work - and the pills ive tried, the consultants and fees etc.. now he just gives him formula when he still looks hungry.. so i have no idea what my supply is really doing... ) - He hasn't gotten around to leaving me a note yet (only note i ever got was just out of the hospital from my little "extended" stay after delivery - as well as the time he told me to take him somewhere because i was just home and nervous about driving somewhere with him and he was throwing a fit that i really didn't want to..) but last nights comments of "are you going to cut my fingernails or should i just cut them myself?" really bugged me *laugh* When i start getting notes i will figure out the fed-x price and send him to your house and you can add yours to the box and we can mail them somewhere far far away... I'd really be in trouble if he knew i hadn't taken a shower yet and am about to do that at almost 2 in the afternoon .

mckayleesmom replied: Im on my way into the shower too, and its 2:30,,,,by the way I would pack up and take a little vacation alone,,,see how they manage without you.

jdkjd replied: Tell you what. I know a certain table that would be on it's way to some people who need it.

I might add some other *items* of his that are needed by others and somehow got mixed up in my "cleaning frenzy" I had.

Big hugs. And maybe you need to make a list for him for this weekend.

Schnoogly replied: I cannot believe these men! What business is it of theirs when you take a shower??? They're not home to smell you right? (Or help AT ALL with the baby right?)

If it wouldn't worry your kids I totally would take off and see how they deal.

Katieleigh's DH especially, I want to give him a big whack in the head. doesn't even begin to cover it. I would have killed him by now. He really has no idea and is being a complete A** IMO.

Steph

mckayleesmom replied: 1st of all I would also chop up the table with an ax and leave a note for him on the chalkboard asking if he still wanted the table in the attic. And the next time he tries to get some "loving", I would tell him that when I was hired to be his employee that that wasn't in my job discription.

Kirstenmumof3 replied: OMG if my DH ever did that he would be getting divorce papers! WACK HIM GOOD!

Mommieto2Girls replied: OMG, what is the matter with him!!!!! I wouldn't touch the house for a week, no dinner, no clean laundry, nothing.

catou_98 replied:
GOOD ONE!

supermom replied: So, victorie2002 - Is DH alive still this morning? I don't know that mine would be if he acted like that - but I am VERY lucky, because he never would. My XH would, but that's one of the reasons he's the X - lol

victoire2002 replied: Thanks for all your posts, everyone. What a rough day that was. We fought ALL DAY LONG, over the telephone. I lost it. I just couldn't handle his implicit criticism, and I let him know that it is unacceptable. This is not the first time we have encountered this problem, either. We were in counseling over this issue right after Aidan was born, and it appeared to have gotten better, but evidently DH hasn't changed completely.

He finally had to come home from work early so we could discuss it some more (after several long phone calls, with lots of yelling on my end). The sick thing is that he actually thinks that he is correct in asking me to *do more* around the house while he's at work. MY theory is the underlying issue is that he misses my income (I had a high paying job prior to quitting to take care of Aidan) and that he is torn between wanting me to work and (in his words) "allowing me to stay home". He has, on several occasions, alluded to his income as "his money" and that he is "paying" for me. He cannot seem to grasp the concept that his income is OUR shared income. He told our counselor this several times--- says it's because I kept my stock portfolio in my own name when we got married and it made him mad. (when we got married I had a lot of worth tied up in stocks, but now the market's down, I don't have much anymore!)

Sometimes I thinks I eat bonbons on the sofa all day and that I don't appreciate staying home with the baby. WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am hoping he'll change, because I find his attitudes a bit chauvenistic, and I told him he doesn't have many chances left. We're Catholic, and don't believe in divorce, but I didn't sign up for this. We have "blow ups" like this every couple of months, and they are usually about the very same subject.

Anyway, this is a lot of information, sorry for the dump. Thanks for reading/listening and all your support the other day.

Mommieto2Girls replied: Awwe, I hope everything gets better, have you thought about going back to the counselor? My DH can be the same way, it always his money. it's a bunch of bologna. Keep us posted on how things go.

Kaitlin'smom replied: Well I hope the discussion has help at least for now. Maybe he need a reality check, I know you probably like staying home with him, but what about some how changing rolls if nothing for a week, you could go away every day like your at work, maybe volinterer or something and he can stay home and take care of things. That might help or not, or like another suggested going back to the conslar.

Hugs to you and I hope you both can work things out!