Single mother and son - sharing rooms

Savannah wrote: i am 16, my son wil be 2 in december. i recently found out that children and youth will be comming by and inspection my home. i have no fears about that because i know i am riasing my child right. but there is one issue. i need to know the age laws regarding a single mom and a son sharing a bed room. we even share the same bed and have done so since he was born. it is illegal? please give me any information u may have on this topic. if the laws are different in different areas, i live in pa

Kirstenmumof3 replied: I personally don't think this should be a problem. I know of many families who co-sleep. I think you are doing the best thing for your son and if this agency has a problem ask them what they would suggest.

Jamison'smama replied: Can you call anonymously to children and youth services and ask them their views? I agree with CJ's mom it shouldn't be a problem but they may disagree for whatever reason and if they do, ask them why they think it is a problem. There is lots of literature out there that supports co-sleeping. If it is against the law to sleep with your child then many families break the law each night--including us.

Keep us posted.

amynicole21 replied: I honestly do not think that there could be a law prohibiting co-sleeping. I wouldn't even bring it up or try to explain it to them when they come. If they say something about it, I would be surprised. Good luck!

Maddie&EthansMom replied: ITA agree! There should not be any reason for them to find fault in this. Our daughter is 3 and still sleeps with us from time to time. I can probably speak for most people on this board when I say there is nothing wrong with this. If the subject arises they will probably overlook it. Especially if you are doing everything else right.

~CrazieMama~ replied: I agree with the other ladies here. I co-sleep with Brianna and I did it with Tyler for the longest time. If you are really concerned about it, call from a pay phone or something and find out. Otherwise, act surprised that they would say something like that.

CantWait replied: Although I see no problem in it, and I have co-slept with my son, and sometimes still do (he's 8 now)......when he was around your son's age I had a problem getting a 1 bedroom apartment because they didn't think it right for a mom and son to share a room. Good Luck and hope all goes well. If they find fault in it, they have bigger problems in the system I think.

mummy2girls replied:
hey your in ed right? did you find it hard in ed? im a single mom and i got a one bedroom with my dd with no problem...just curious

jcc64 replied: I certainly have no judgements about co-sleeping. My 1 yr old has slept with us all her life, and her brothers did the same before they got too old and too big. (BTW, the 8 yr old still comes in occasionally).
Having said that, reason and bureacracy do not always go hand and hand. Social workers are trained to look for "clues" about a parent's competency, whether they are relevent or not. I would be prepared to answer their questions about a "lack of provisions" for your child. Specifically, make sure that they understand that your child being in your bed is a CHOICE, not b/c you are unwilling or unable to provide a "better" alternative. Also, not just for the benefit of the visit but also for your child, make sure the bed is in fact safe for a baby. Meaning, no space between the bed and the headboard or wall,etc..
Co-sleeping is not illegal, but there are plenty of people who have very harsh opinions about it, whether or not it's their business. Just be prepared to defend yourself.
Good luck

MommyToAshley replied: ITA with the others, I see nothing wrong with it (even though I chose not to co-sleep). But, be prepared with your answers as to why you co-sleep. Maybe print out some things from Dr. Sears web site (or have his book handy) or have some other documentation from professionals on hand to show that you made an educated choice for the welfare of your child.

I hope everything goes well for you, please let us know how it goes!

Good Luck and Hugs!

CantWait replied:
Yes I'm in Edmonton. It was actually when I was living in Toronto that I tried to get an apartment while DH was away.

A&A'smommy replied: i dont have any advice for you but i dont think there is anything wrong with a mother sharing a bed with her baby, in fact its probably makes him feel a lot safer! Its probably a good idea to call and ask if it sounds alright i believe thats what i would do if i was in your situation. I hope all goes well and let us know what they say!