Things you never thought you would say - just for fun.

PrairieMom wrote: I found myself saying some pretty strange things lately and thought it might be fun to do a thread about.

So, what are some strange things that you never thought you would hear your self say, or that just sounded strange coming out of your mouth?

PrairieMom replied: I'll start

To Al:

STOP!!!!! painting with that cheese!!!

PrairieMom replied: To Al:

What are you eating that is crunching like that?

mckayleesmom replied: Don't pick your nose or your brain will fall out...

mckayleesmom replied: I use Batman (the love of Russell's life for everything).

Batman eats all his vegetables.

Batman would never spit on his sister and he would be so upset with you.

Batman still gets spankings from his mom, keep that in mind buddy.

My2Beauties replied: To Aubrey: You cannot flush a baby doll down the toilet so please don't try

I have many more they'll come to me I'm sure.

PrairieMom replied: to ben:
Mary definately put onions in Jesus's latkes.
lol

stella6979 replied: Just lay still Avery, I'm going to use these tweezers to pull that popcorn seed out of your nose.

ZandersMama replied: To zander.

don't put spagetti in your ears

To zavier,

stop licking the cat, they do it themselves

DVFlyer replied: To wife:

"Honey... is Chloe's poop supposed to be this color?"

lovemy2 replied: To BOTH my kids:

If you don't stop I am going to turn this car around and we are going home

moped replied:

moped replied: Wel maybe not funny, but when i get home from work I have to ask:

How was everyones day?
Did everyone eat good?
Did everyone sleep/nap good
How may poops today? Were they a good color and texture?

Our Lil' Family replied: No Thomas, you don't need to go inside to pee, just pee off the patio.

moped replied:
Oh good one!!!!!!!! That is funny.

I will have to listen to myself and see what I say..........

DVFlyer replied: I swear I just got this email about 20 minutes ago.... talk about relevant to this thread!

My wife just wrote me this email:

>> NO WAY DID YOUR SON JUST PEE (but she said a word the censor changes) IN MY MOUTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>> AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

redchief replied: In response to, "All men are messed up." <-- Language cleaned for G rating

Me, "Maybe it's not the men at all...." That reply didn't go so good for me.

redchief replied: Yes, Mr. Dean was bad. (In reply to our licensing clerk when I forgot to memorialize a time extension today)

Because I'm the chief, that's why. (Before I was chief I never thought I'd ever say the firefighters' equivalent to "because I said so," but I find myself saying it way too often)

You're going to be a smart a**, aren't you? (To a fellow chief last night during a contentious county fire chiefs meeting) BTW, his answer, "Yep."

I'm not sure I can tell the day's funniest in this forum. My wife went with one of my rookies to see the house his parents had built. I can't tell you what I warned him, but in all adult company it would be considered on the rude side of quite funny.

boyohboyohboy replied: Myself to Jake..
"because if you dont wipe your butt each and every time, you will have to go the hosp. and get that machine!"
Jake I will wipe every time.

luvmykids replied: Did you just eat the same green bean that was up your nose?
If you're lying, you'll get a forked tongue.
No, not all moms are as mean as me. You just got lucky.

And one I never thought I'd hear:
"This is a good dinner, babe. Like what they serve in prison."