Ugh, he irritated me yesterday!

MomToMany wrote: Yesterday, DH comes home from work early with no warning. It friggin' irritates me when he does that! He comes home and says he doesn't feel good. By that he means he has a headache or a stuffed up nose . I just want to tell him to suck it up and deal with it! The kids go wild as soon as he gets home, and he proceeds to take a nap. Grrrrrr!!!!!

He's done this on several occasions!! I'm trying to get work done around here, but I can't because the kids are so hyper! He doesn't help with any of it either.


Sorry I'm whining again .

jdkjd replied: Just had a "suck it up" conversation a couple hours ago.

They (DHs) need to have them regularly...except for Viggo of course.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: As far as I'm concerned, if it ain't broken or bleeding, nobody gets to take a nap.

I have te deal with the kids longer in the day that he does.... and I get the worst of it (dinner, bath and bed time) because he "thinks" he needs to work on his computer program...which he does, but he could do it when I'm in bed at 9pm.... wheras as he has to do it get the dressed in the morning and drive them to and pick them up from daycare (I feed them breakfast while he showers, since I'm up 30 minutes before everyone else I shower first thing)

And he has the NERVE to tell me "I've had a long day at work, do you mind if I take a nap?" For crying out loud....

Kaitlin'smom replied: oh I am right with you on this one why do they get to nap when they dont feel good but if we dont then to bad. DH did this last saturday morning he had an appointment (for new life insurace) sat morning at 8:30a so I also had to get up for Kaitlin well he went back to bed and slept until he got up from her nap I even went in once to ask if he could get up so I could shower, never did I had to waite until she was taking her nap, I was so mad. I said must be nice to sleep all day. I am supposed to get a moring to sleep in but it NEVER works out. gurrrrr

whine all you want

A&A'smommy replied:
ITA if we don't get to take a nap neither do they!!!!

I'm sorry Mollie its hard enough when their hyper and it sucks even worse when its their fault

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: I hear ya! You have every right to be angry. My DH on the other hand does the opposite all the time. He comes home a lot LATER than he tells me. And then complains that he's so tired..blah blah blah. He's never around to see all that I do all day. I expect him to spend some time after work with the baby and not go directly to bed. He gets home, picks up the baby for maybe like 10 minutes and then goes to bed. And says "I have to get up realllllllly early tomorrow." Oh poor me. Or he gets on the computer - hasn't he been on a computer ALL day??? Oh and of course he gets dinner - made by ME of course. Laundry can be still in baskets, dishes in sink...but HE gets to go to bed. His response when I complain is always "well just ask me to help out and I'll do it." Why do I have to ask him to give the baby a bath and into bed? Can't he figure it out that it needs to be done? My biggest pet-peeve is when he turns off all the lights in the house because HE'S ready to go to bed...I'm still up doing a zillion things!

Anyhow, I don't want put all men in one category, but I really think their (or I should say MY dh's) priorities are obviously much different than ours when it comes to raising kids. I think things are a little more black and white for them - at least they are for my husband. He's a great father, but doesn't see that kids need A LOT more than just a 10 min wrestle or lift on his shoulder. I have to say "hey go read the baby a book or something" or otherwise he's off doing his own thing. I understand that sometimes one just needs to crawl into bed, but take some responsibility for your actions man - like realize that the kids get hyper when you come home early! I know exactly how you feel...although I only have one baby (well maybe 2 including my DH) to take care of.

We were all sick a couple weeks ago - but I NEVER got to relax and take care of myself. When it comes to colds...it's all about my DH. Guess that's what they're used to...my MIL would drop everything for him even to this day! 30 year old baby.

Hang in there

Rae
SAHM of Wil
Born 8/31/04

DVFlyer replied: Boy are you making me feel good about how I treat my wife (not that I'm perfect, mind you).

Sure I'm tired when I get home from work some days. And I know my wife is tired from being home all day, but sometimes I beg her to take a nap. I'd be happy to play with my little girl for an hour or so (or whatever) when I get home. I actually feel bad that I only get to see her a few hours a day.

Rae- Thanks so much for making the statement about not wanting to put all men into the same category. Since I am a man, reading these posts typically gets me all fired up because for some reason I feel the need to defend a "man's" actions. Although I try to give insight into our personalities at the same time.

M2M,

Question for you. When you say that you are trying to get work done around here, are they things that hubby could do? i.e. can you bargain with him? "You can take a nap, but when you get up would you mind starting the laundry"? etc.

I find that just taking one small task from my wife is usally all it takes to make a big impression on her because (through her nature), she tries to get EVERYthing done herself. I'm happy to help when I can.

loveydad replied:
Aww I feel special.

loveydad replied:
Yeah i feel that way too. obviouslly.

MomToMany replied:
Wow, you are awesome! You're wife is so lucky!

As for chores around the house, there's stuff I like done my way, especially the laundry (the diapers are off-limits to him!). I also work at home putting things together for the company DH works for. It's hard to get that done when the kids are so wild. He helps with them when he can. Most of the other stuff is divided up between the older 2 boys as their chores.

It's just little things that irritate me. He will tell the kids they can go outside to play, but won't help them get their stuff on. He gets to go to the Snow Cross this weekend, but I got to stay home and work on putting those cables together. He asked me if I can get them all done this weekend, which I replied, "Yes I can!" in an irritated tone. I'd rather be at home anyway I guess.

DVFlyer replied:

I have my moments...... both good and bad.

Come on now, you wouldn't *really* rather stay home would you? From what I've read, your husband needs to give you a break now and then. He won't do this unless you make him. I know, because many times I'm like that. I need a little kick in the pants. BUT, it's usually because I don't see (or don't want to see) where my help would be appreciated.

Also, letting go of "your way" might do you some good. If you can get him to chip in on a couple of things, you might find that *gulp* he might do that task as good or better than you. Or at the very least good enough for you to get a few minutes to yourself.

Good luck. If I was there, I'd drive your butt down to the local manicure/ pedicure location and strap you in one of those massage chairs for 30 minutes. It's like $19 out here for a man/ ped in one of those chairs. Cheap, fun, easy, and I'm sure your husband could handle it alone for 30 minutes.

MomToMany replied:
Oh, gee, how can I argue with that offer???

Yes, I need to get out of the house more. I need to have a life of my own sometimes. My only real hobby is my cloth diapers; I love buying them, washing them, folding them, putting them away, and of course seeing them on the girls!

Maybe I'll just have to ask him to do certain things for me. Maybe he CAN do it better than me.

You actually made me cry, so that wasn't nice. I guess I miss being pampered. I've never had a manicure or pedicure done, so that would be a new experience for me, LOL.

Thank you!

gr33n3y3z replied: My Hubby did the dishes yesterday and I didnt ask him to and he cleaned the bathroom while I was at work .... I have a great hubby I just love him so much

My2Beauties replied: Well I can vent about the nap thing and having to do the bathtime/bedtime routine because Brian seems to think when it's 9:00 pm and Hanna is still gonig buck wild that he can snooze away and leave me to putting her to bed etc...but I will say this...the man does do his fair share of the cleaning in our house...I'm lazy when it comes to that.. although I am getting better, I have done dishes and vaccummed for the past 3 days now! On a roll

DVFlyer replied: Made you cry? Sorry. I'll have to think of a joke to make you laugh.

Seriously, though, you have to try one of those massage chair man/ peds. I often get certificates for our customer service girls and they love them. They can go on their lunch break and come back all sparkly new.

[joke]

So an Arab and a Minnesotan get married and have a baby boy. What do they name him?


Yassir Yabetcha


[/joke]

MomToMany replied:

LOL, that's a good joke, especially since I live in Minnesota!!!!

You made me cry in a GOOD way . My humor didn't come across there real well .

Thanks for all of you help. It has really helped a lot !