Very wierd...

mummy2girls wrote: k i just found this very odd and maby its just me but i think maby the new baby did this to him. Dont worry im not falling for it.

Aron came by on saturday to see Jenna and i usually dont let him stay but the way jenna reacted to him i said fine but for just a bit. he had a bunch of change he wanted to roll while here. About 2 different times he referred to me, jenna and him as "family". i had to remind him over and ober that we werent. He was holding jenna in a cradling postion and said Jenna you are getting sooooooooo big, and then turned to me and said wow shelly remember when we were able to hold her in our arms. I said no not really and he said geez shelly im trying to be sentimental and your ruining it. Then about 3 times over and over he keopt sayign she is so big, time is flying by so fast and i dont like it. He was bieng very sweet to me as if we were a couple. He asked if i was ok. He then asked if i wanted to see a pic of the baby. It was a moment where my mouth was open but nothing came out. I wanted to see how the baby l;ooked but i wasnt ready so maby thats why no words came out. jenna says yes mommy does. And aron says no mommy isnt ready to see teh baby. He even wanted to walk to the corner store with jenna and me. which is very odd for him to do this.

so after that visit i realized maybe him having chase all day everyday( as bea hasnt left his place since he was born) that he is realizing he lost alot of that time with jenna because of the way he was. and maybe he feels guilty that he treated me and jenna that way so maby he is trying to make it up.

But you know guys nothing will make up to how he treated us and how he was. So he can be as sweet as pie as he wants it just wont cut it for me. he had his chance and he ruined that time with jenna.

ZandersMama replied: I hope he keeps being nice to her.

luvbug00 replied: In a way i also think he sees his mistakes of the past. But it's never too late for Jenna and him to have a good relationship. As far as the three of you, you ARE a family. as much as i lothe Brad we made a child together. we made a family and regadless if we stay together or not or how stuiped he acts we are still a family. even if Lars and i are not married we are a family. Family is A family consists of a domestic group of people (or a number of domestic groups), typically affiliated by birth or marriage, or by analogous or comparable relationships — including domestic partnership, cohabitation, adoption, surname and (in some cases) ownership (as occurred in the Roman Empire). in our cases affiliated by birth of our children. so i don't think it's very fair to tell Aron in frount of Jenna that you are not a family. JMO

Kaitlin'smom replied: Well I hope for Jenna's sake he will stop being such a PITA and finally realise how special she is, and now of cousre I would be leary of him just cause you know whats he is like but TBH for Jenna's sake let him, but dont let your gaurd down, just dont let her see it.

gr33n3y3z replied:
you cant feel that way for Jenna Shelly maybe for yourself but not her

I hope he continues to be like that for Jenna

Maddie&EthansMom replied: I can understand you being hurt. I have no idea how I would react in that situation. I think it is good for him to realize the time he lost. Better late than never, kwim? He needs to be there for her. I know you are trying to protect her from being hurt, the way he hurt you time and time again. Jenna deserves for him to try and prove himself. That's her daddy.

A&A'smommy replied: I wouldn't let him back in either but I REALLY hope that has realized all those things and starts to treat Jenna better!!!

mummy2girls replied:
actually Nadia i didnt say it in front of jenna im nto that stupid to do that. and i know teh meaning of family.. i may be blonde but not that dumb! Im sorry but thats how i feel right now. And no me aron and jenna are not family. me and jenna is. and him and bea and chase and jenna is family. me marcus and jenna is family but believe me i will nto consider aron my family. he hurt me way to badly. and yes i know its not too late for jenna im just saying its too late to make up for the first years of her life that he screwed her on. he was an imiature butt and i will stick byu that! so thank you for teh explanation of what family emans because i knew it already!

grapfruit replied: I'm sorry he's hurt you so much and I'd be leary too. But even at 23 I still wish I had a better relationship w/my dad. I think if he realized the error of his ways and decided to make an effort to re-kindle a relationship I'd be happy. So I agree w/everyone else. Be on guard, but let Jenna enjoy this. Maybe she'll remember the good memories in the long run.

mummy2girls replied:
ok i guess i didnt explain it right, i will never hold jenna and her dad away from a relationship! im just saying he was a butt and he cant get back those first years of her life. yes he can make it better but he will never get the past back! I will always have my gurad up for sure!!!!

mummy2girls replied:
ok obviously im not sayign ti right, I know he will have a relationship with her and can make it better .. what im saying is that he ruined having that relationship with her the first few years. he can make it better but he cant take the past away!

mummy2girls replied:
i know guys! i know she does.. ok im goign to stop talking. what i meant is he will never get the past back but the future he can. im just saying he ruined it big time in teh past!

grapfruit replied:
Which gives you EVERY right to be leary. And in view of past performance, I'd say you'd be right to keep an eye on him. I hope Jenna doesn't get her hopes up too much, and I hope he continues being nice. *fingers crossed*

grapfruit replied:
Hopefully he'll make enough GOOD memories to make the bad ones fade away...

Kaitlin'smom replied:
I am not saying you would ever hold them appart, maybe I cam eoff wrong as well. I just mean I hope he stoped being the PITA he is/was and starts to enjoy his daughter, and no you can never make up for the past, and you will always remember his being a PITA her first fews years so your going to be leary of everything to do with him. Sorry if I came off bad. Oh and I agree with you Aron will never be your family, just like my sisters woudl never consider ther x's part of there family due to there actions.

PrairieMom replied: I'm feeling like you could use a hug.

Our Lil' Family replied: I just wanted to say I agree with you on the family part....completely!
And I just wanted to give you as well!

Maddie&EthansMom replied:

lisar replied: He cant make up for lost time. He will learn that real quick. I hope he does turn into a better father for Jenna's sake. Good luck with it all.

luvbug00 replied: first off. I'm sorry, i was under the impression Aron had called you a family in frount of Jenna and you responded in that moment. so that, i was wrong.

i am however not sorry for the rest. I know your not dumb.( regardless of haircolor i hate sterotypes by the way) I was just pulling an example of the deffinition for lack of better words at the time. I know from your posts that he has not been the best father for Jenna and not respectful of you. Niether has Brad and his parenting skills are quickly dominishing and i get to deal with that just like you. But no matter how much of an ___ Brad is. IMO he is Family. and regarless of any wrong he has, is or continues to do I will be the better person. That's all i need to know. I believe people can aspire to chage and although some never fully do. I agree u should be wary but not close minded to his efforts. Just set your boundries in your relationship with him. I hope he continues to slowly progress and you can find a civil place with him.

Calimama replied:

mummy2girls replied: i will never consider him family though! when someone hurts me as bad as they have then they are not a part of my family.

Mommy2BAK replied: Good for Jenna, I'm glad he is starting to straiten his act. Whats done is done, holding grudges usually just hurts yourself. I hope he can prove to you that he will be different.

My3LilMonkeys replied: I hope he continues to be there for Jenna in the future.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: Oh Shelly.

Coming from a broken home, i understand what you mean. You and Jenna are family. Jenna and Aron are family. But you and Aron are not, but you remain "friends" because of your mutual daughter.

As much as he's screwed up in the past, and ruined his chance at being with Jenna while she was little and growing up, maybe this birth has given him perspective as to exactly how much he's screwed up, and maybe just maybe he's trying to smarten up a little for Jenna's sake.

Let's hope so.

Quit picking on Shelly ya'll.

Kaitlin'smom replied:
I wasn't I am deffinalty on her side.

mummy2girls replied:
Thanks Rocky!

thats what iw as tryign to get at... we are friends and thats it.. he ruined teh family aspect when it comes to me BUT he and jenna will always be family and i know that and i accept that and i would never take that from her and him. I hope this new baby did bring out the guilt and hopefully he will be better! Maby there is a reason why chase arrived and became a part of arons life..

anyways...

dont worry di you werent picking on me. I guess we just worded our reponses wrong... i hate this computer stuff when trying to say something...

but even if some or all of you think aron should and will still eb my family that si something i will go agasint till the day i die! my family is Marcus, jenna and me. Thats it. I will remain friends with aron and be civil for jenna's sake because her happiness out weighs mine for sure!

I understand nadia what you mean about the family thing and your ex as well but i guess i just feel differently when it comes to that kind of stuff. I guess because ive been hurt over and over not by just aron but other people in my life that I have come to the conclusion that I am just going to keep the people that treat me with respect and such my family. I will never exclude jenna from him or anything ebcause i believe a dad is important in a little girls life. I guess you just have to live in my shoes to know the extent of why i feel teh way i do.