What weight is "too big" to have a baby?

MomToMany wrote: Do you think that if a woman is too big, she shouldn't have a baby? What do you consider "too big"?

Just wondering everyone's thoughts on this.

ediep replied: never heared of this

I have heared that it may be harder to concieve if the mother is obese

kimberley replied: umm no. women of all sizes and shapes have been having babies for centuries. as long as proper prenatal care is followed, i don't see a problem. only way i might say they shouldn't is if there were serious health issues that could be fatal to mom or baby. jmo.

coasterqueen replied:
I agree.

Kaitlin'smom replied: I would say only if the woman is in poor heath no matter her size she should not be having a child. for example obese woman who are at serious health risk shoudl not carry a baby nor should some one that is malnurshed.

booey2 replied: NOPE - So but I have to respond to this one because I was around 290 when I got pg with Matthew 7 years ago and went over 300 before losing weight while I was pg with him. When I got pg with Thomas I as aroudn 270 not getting as big with him but women of size should be allowed to get pg and have children as long as they are healthy. Can I ask why you are asking?

sunshine girls replied: When I got pregnant with Elle my OB told me I was to thin to have a child, and suggested aborting the pregnancy. I changed doctors and the other one didn't have a problem with my weight. So I agree with Kimberly.

coasterqueen replied: I have heard of women being too thin to carry a child, though. A past co-worker of mine tried to get pg for years. She was thinner than a broomstick . As soon as she gained weight she got pg. She just kept miscarrying before that.

Hillbilly Housewife replied: I wouldn't say they shouldn't because that's unfair. But if they are very obes, they may have other health related issues that maycomplicate things, like higer blood pressure, risk for heart problames, diabetes...etc...

I would htink that being too thini would be more of a problem.

My question is... if they're really really big (like 400 pounds and over... HOW does thatwork? I've always wondered... especially if the dad is very very big also... I,ve seen some couples with kids, and all I can think of is HOW did they conceive? sorry... that might be offensive... but I wonder anyways! I mean...if DH and I had trouble getting it on when only I was big... and I wasn't thtat big... kwim?

LdunnoL

sunshine girls replied: I think that thiness would be more of a problem too, people who have anorexia nervosa have difficulty having children.

I think that couples who are both obese, like 400 pounds or over, can find ways to have sex. It would just be a matter of positions, there would be a way.

jcc64 replied: A woman's health, regardless of her size, should be the determining factor. There are fat people in excellent health, there are thin people in poor health. It's a case by case thing.
I do believe that disapproval and judgment directed at people b/c of their size is unfortunately still a very acceptable form of prejudice, and I'm sorry for that.

A&A'smommy replied:
ITA!!!

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: I find this an odd question...because truthfully, how can any one of us determine what is "too big", unless we were all doctors. It's of course a matter of opinion, but by stating it, I think it will hurt feelings. JMO.

Size has never ever crossed my mind when it came to people having children. As long as you're in good health, who has the right to stop you?? I've suffered anorexia and bulimia before, so yes, I made sure I was healthy before deciding to conceive, but that was only mine and my DH's choice to make.

Boys r us replied: This is interesting..my SIL is overweight and she asked my opinion on the matter last year and I told her based on several reports that indicate that obese women have a greater risk of birth defects, that it would be more ideal for her to try to lose as much weight as she could b/f trying to conceive.
So, yes, I do stand beside opinion that, no it should not stop you from having a baby, but if you know that you want to conceive, then for health reasons to both the mother and the baby, it is advisable to lose weight prior to trying.

MomToJade&Jordan replied: I weighed over 270 when I gave birth to both of my girls. I agree with everyone else that size isn't an issue. The health of the mother should be the more important thing.

Boys r us replied: There are health conditions that being overweight or obese increases the risk for during pregnancy. Among these include:

Preeclampsia
Premature Birth
Gestational Diabetes
Cesarean Sections
Giving Birth to Children with Obesity Problems
Unfortunately women who are already overweight prior to pregnancy are more likely to gain excessive amounts of weight during pregnancy. Several studies have suggested that more than 80 percent of overweight and obese women will gain too much weight, defined as weight exceeding 40 pounds or more, during their pregnancy.

Women who are obese and give birth are also more at risk for maternal mortality during labor and delivery. The cesarean rates are often higher because labor fails to progress in a timely fashion.

Did you know that gaining more than the recommended amount of weight during pregnancy also puts you at risk for being overweight several years after pregnancy?

Babies born to mothers that are overweight might also experience a number of health problems. Those most often cited by studies include an increased risk of congenital heart defects and a greater risk of neural tube defects.

MomToMany replied:
Hmmm, maybe that's why Kayla has her heart condition? The Dr.'s just said it was a birth defect. No one ever mentioned what my weight was or if it was a factor at all . I'm in good health otherwise.

But I've also read that losing weight before conceiving can be just as unhealthy if not more so .

I guess the only "safe" thing would be to delay conception for about 5 years while I got down to my ideal weight, and STAY at that weight for a few years. But that's not always in Mother Nature's plans .

Not everyone can be the perfect size 6 (or 4 or whatever the perfect size is). Size prejudice is all too real, which I find very sad.

My2Beauties replied: Wow I never knew all of that could happen from being overweight. What does that study consider overweight - just wondering? I think if the doctor is concerned then the woman should be concerned but if the doctor believes the women is healthy enough then that is fine. I don't think that size matters per se, unless extremely obese women (probably the ones that were represented in the study NIchole posted) were in question, because of the risks involved.

That thin thing makes me mad sometimes too. Now anorexia and bulimia is one thing, yes if you have one of those conditions then I agree it's very bad to try and conceive, however I am very thin, weighed 102 pounds when I got pregnant, but I am healthy and I gained 37 pounds when I was pregnant and had a very fat happy baby! I hated it when people would say Oh you're too skinny to give birth you're gonna need a c-section - puhlease! But I could see how a woman that was unhealthy thin would have problems. But not thin by nature!

booey2 replied: I am not sure if I am just plain lucky or what but according to the current health guidelines when I had both my boys I was/am considered obese not just overweight and they are both healthy and happy children. I also did not gain more than maybe 10 pounds total with each pg - I gained it afterward when my thyroid bottoms out. There are risks for every woman who gets pg they are increased by how much far away for the considered normal weight, be it over or under. JMO

Boys r us replied: Molly, you asked for my opinion..I gave it, I'm sorry that you found it offensive or prejudiced! but if you would like to REread what I posted, it reads that NO, IT SHOULD NOT STOP YOU from having a baby, but that FOR HEALTH reasons it's ADVISABLE or more IDEAL!

I have nothing against being overweight, underweight, black, white, red, purple, male, female, rich, poor..so I couldn't agree with you more, it is sad when people discriminate..but it's even sadder when people want to believe someone is discrimating against them and they're not. I could care less if an overweight person has a baby, it's not my health or my baby's health that has the possibility of being jeopordized. Not to mention I did say that it shouldn't stop you, but rather that for obvious reasons it's BETTER if you're not overweight..you know..like in a perfect world!

If I said that fat people shouldn't have babies b/c they're going to have fat babies and the parents won't be able to take care of them b/c they'll be out of breath before getting off of the couch...THAT, Molly, would be size prejudice. But stating facts that the medical profession has proven real regarding to the POSSIBLE effects of being overweight during pregnancy and having a baby with birth defects, that is NOT size prejudice. unfortunately sometimes in real life, being overweight CAN cause health problems. Just a fact.

Boys r us replied: BTW I started out normal weight with Braedon and gained 80 pounds during my pregnancy, do I think that was the most healthy shape I could have been in while carrying my baby? No..I think it's ridiculous that I gained 80 pounds and there is really no excuse for it, other than I just was out of control with my eating. So..no I'm not picking on people being overweight while pregnant b/c een though i diodn't start out overweight while pg with brae, I ended up being!

3_call_me_mama replied:
That's funny cause i heard that too adn was terrified becasue i was obese (well not in my opinion but medically my BMI was considered obese) and I thought I would gain a ton of weight and be even heavier. But in fact with Cameorn i gained 12 lbs adn with Kathleen I gained 11! So guess I was lucky enough ot be the exception.
But I was also told that women who are overweight have a harder time concieveing then if they were lighter adn also a harder delivery. Both of mine were pretty smooth adn easy and had no troubles concieving with either. But again that's just one person compared to however many hundreds they did this study on. If I were to ever have another child I woudl want to loose weight before concieving solely for the benefit of feeling better about myself, and hopefully havign some incentive to get smaller again after . Hope that helps.. (I think i knwo why you are asking and HUGS to you. )

also I didn't have any of these problems and neither have my children... so I would do more research befor ei accepted this study... but it is interesting .

MomToMany replied: I'm sorry Nichole, it wasn't aimed at you, but the whole society's prejudice against big people in general. I didn't find your post offensive at all. Sorry.

I wasn't always big. I've been big ever since I had Quentin. I think it was from the Depo Provera shot. Ever since then, I've been heavy. I wish I never got that stuff ! My thyroid is fine, my blood sugar is fine, my blood pressure is fine, and I'm in good health, just heavy. I'm trying to work on it.

3_call_me_mama replied: Sorry guys.. I can't spell. I hate this keyboard and I actually CAN spell when i type slowly on our other comp

Insanemomof3 replied: I don't think anyone, no matter their weight, should be told they should/shouldn't have a baby. It is their choice. Unless there are health issues, I see no problem with it.

My3LilMonkeys replied: I agree with most of the others. Health should be the determining factor, NOT weight.

holley79 replied: Well I was 265 pounds and was on weight watchers. I got down to 185 and without really trying, got pregnant. Didn't think I could since I hadn't in the 4 years of unprotected. I think the weight lose had something to do with it.

As for a woman being too big. I think it's really her decision. I think there are added health risks that come with it, but that can happen to anyone of any size. JMO

TsurugiButterfly replied: I have to admit I'm kind of jealous of some of the women here who only gained a few pounds during pregnancy. I was overweight when I got pregnant -- I was about 245, and my fiance and I went on Atkins and I was about 205 when I found out I was pregnant. Size shouldn't affect you too much, unless you're unlikely like me and find a size-phobic doctor. What do I mean by size-phobic? Demanding glucose screens every MONTH for me, instead of the standard test at 28 weeks. The disdainful looks every time I got onto the scale... At 20 weeks he was already talking about me having a C-section because the baby would be too fat for me to have vaginally. (Which is a load of bunk because the ultrasound tech told us Tristan's measurements have been perfectly normal at every stage so far... not "too large" at all).

Sure, I have gestational diabetes... which didn't show up until, well, what do you know? 30 weeks. You should have seen the smug looks I got after that, almost like an "I told you so."

I'm not going to go into the rest of the reasons why I hated my doctor... needless to say I finally changed doctors just recently. Why did I wait so long? Because I'm young, stupid, and being my first baby, I thought all these things were my fault, not just him being a jerk.

So if a doctor tells you you're too fat, or that you should abort the baby, try finding a new doctor.

holley79 replied: Sorry your doctor has been such a jerk to you. I am jelous of those that only gained a little bit of weight also. I have gained a total of 48 pounds now. I don't have any medical problems thank goodness. She is healthy in there. Everytime I get on the scale I cry. My doctor pretty much pats me on the head and tells me it's going to be ok. Some women gain more then others that is all there is too it. I'm sure if we polled it here there were NOT very many woman that stayed within the "ideal" weight gain standards. JMHO