Would you leave your ds/dd with your parents - if they'd injured themselves prior?

ilovemybaby wrote: or if they are sick (with a cold or flu)?

One time my parents asked if they could take Abby to the beach and I said yes. Then about 15 minutes before they were picking her up she ran into the side of the wall in the sitting room and hit her head on the corner and she had a dent mark and bruise on her head. She was ok... but I didn't want to give her to my parents because I was worried about concusion or something worse. I think because she had a head injury at 9 months when she hits her head on something I freak out way more than I would otherwise...
So anyway, I phoned my dad and told him what happened and said I didn't want her to go out now. He made me feel really bad about not letting them take her so I said "fine, you can take her". He was like "don't worry about her, she'll be ok, if something happens we'd phone you straight away". So anyway, I let them take her but the whole time she was gone I was upset and worrying myself sick about her.

I was just wondering what everyone elses thoughts are on this? Would you let your parents take care of ds/dd if they had hurt themselves beforehand? Or if they are sick? I don't know that I could leave Abby with someone else if she was sick. I'd be too worried about her and me not being there for her. WDYT?
I know my grandmother used to babysit us sometimes when I was sick. Once I even had Pneumonia and my mother let her take care of me and she took me to an Ice Skating show HAHA I wanted to go but she was really anxious about it. She ended up taking me there but I had to dress in really warm clothing. I was about 9. She's even taken me to the doctor once when she picked me up from a camp because I had Tonsillitis. I don't know that I would want anyone else taking Abby to the doctor but me and Paul. My parents maybe ... but no one else.

Thoughts?

My3LilMonkeys replied: Well I send my girls to the babysitters (which are MIL, SIL and my mom depending on what day of the week it is) sick. My girls are used to them and are as comfortable around them as they are DH and I so it works out just fine for us.

As for injured, I don't think I would send them just to play (like Abby was going) if they had just been injured or if they were sick. I would still send them in a babysitting situation if they were injured because I trust our babysitters to take good care of them.

mysweetpeasWil&Wes replied: I guess it all depends on the severity of the injury and/or illness. I wouldn't feel it's fair to my parents to have to take care of a sick child, but if it were just a mild cold and I had to go to a mandatory meeting or rush to the hospital myself, well then yes, I would probably allow it. It just depends on the situation of course.

ilovemybaby replied: I guess it's not such a biggie for us because I'm a SAHM so she doesn't HAVE to go to a babysitter or my parents or sister. If she had a babysitter I guess I wouldn't have the option of whether or not she goes... unless she was REALLY sick and I took time off work.

I didn't really like giving her to my parents that time. I basically lay in bed the whole time crying or just unhappy and worried. KWIM? I should have just said no. But I know my parents would have been upset. In the end she was completely fine though... guess I was just being over-protective!

CantWait replied: Well here's a question for yourself. How did your parents do raising you?? If you say pretty darn good, then why don't you think they'll be able to handle their granddaughter the same as their daughter. KWIM?

holley79 replied: My parents I would let Annika go off with. My parents did just fine with raising me. If it were anyone else, even my little sister, I would not allow Annika to go off if she was injuried or sick. DH's biological mother, no. DH's dad that raised him and his wife, yes. Just all depends and how well you trust the person. I guess maybe I'm not a very good first time mom because everyone else I know freaks.

MamaJAM replied: In the case you mention -- a head injury and a trip to the beach - NO, I would keep my child home to be safe. For most injury things I wouldn't let my child go away with anyone (not my parents or ILs or anyone)....especially not for just a 'recreational' thing.

Depending on the situation I would have someone babysit while I have a sick child (though not my mother since she's going through chemo). I would not let a sick child do a recreational thing (like the beach or a playground) only because I wouldn't want them to get sick or feel worse while out.

AlexsPajamaMama replied: If DS was sick and MIL or who ever wanted to have him for the day/over night just for fun I would say no and I think I have in the past.
My Nana watches him one day a week while I clean at my Dads house, but if he is sick I dont send him

ilovemybaby replied:
It's not that I don't trust them. I just feel bad giving her to someone else when she isn't feeling well or if she is in pain. Because I'm her mother and I should be the one comforting her etc...
In this situation I knew that my dad would phone straight away if anything did happen but I was more upset that I wouldn't be with her if something did go wrong. They would take her to the hospital and I would arrive 30 minutes or more later KWIM? I didn't like the idea of them taking her to the hospital instead of Paul and I. Because we are her parents.

As for their parenting skills... hmmm. That's all I can say. They've done a lot of things I wouldn't do. Like putting Sherry in my baby bottle (a tiny amount) to help me go to sleep. And locking my sister and I in the cupboard if we fought so we could sort ourselves out. This was a Psychiatrists advice to them as well as making me drink from a baby bottle when they found me playing doctors and nurses with my little bf at 4 years old. This was a Psychiatrists advice too.
Also they have given me a few reasons to not fully trust them with Abby... I mentioned these in another post.

ilovemybaby replied:
That's exactly what I think. Oh well, if something like that happens again I will say NO!

CantWait replied:
Hmmmmmm!!! Ok I can't say anything, you'll have to use your better judgement on this one. Sorry no help.

~~*Missi*~~ replied: My parents and I share a home. so they see sabrina daily and i dont' let anyone but them take her. If we need a sitter its them. I have yet to trust anyone else with her... So kinda a different situation but i would let her go even if we didn't live together.
Sabrina is like her father also "accident prone" If i had a nickeal for everytime this little girl fell hit or banged something i would be a billionarie! I have this house so "child"proof but still she finds something.... so if it was jsut another bump or bruise from her running into stuff for whatever reason not paying attention etc... yes i would let them take her, anywhere. If she was running a fever no she belongs home. If she broke something or head injury she'd be the hospital and we would all be there i am sure. But i also live in a situation different then most. We are all in this house together and although we are sabrina's parents she is use to them in a way most kids aren't with grandparents. She sees them 24/7 etc...

I look at my parents as great parents to me and great grandparents. My mom is a RN also and she wouldnt' let anything happen to her... plus they raised me and i don't think they did such a bad job... so why not.
I worry and call a million times but if i didn't i would think that i didn't care and my mom would think i died LOL.....
I would have let her go and explained what happened and I am sure had having kids of thier own in past they would be aware of what to look for and what to do and I know i would be the second call next to 911 if need be...

HTH

Kaitlin'smom replied: depends if its just a bump or small cut, why runion everyones day. head injury or something a bit more severe then NO she is staying with me I dont care whos feelings I hurt.

as for sick again it depends mild cold, slight fever (when she was teething, molers) runny nose as long as she is feeling ok and yes she can go to the sitters or family but not for running around making anyhting worse. Heavier illness, she will stay home with me.

lesliesmom replied: I probably would let my ds/dd go if they were acting okay and didn't show signs of anything more serious than a bump or bruise. As for them being sick, when they are, I usually have my parents or my MIL watch that child (or children depending). At this point, I don't have vacation time (i'm saving it for my maternity leave) and DH's schedule does not always allow him to take time off (although he has been able to do more and more). So, I would say, I would let them take them either way. I would just be calling frequently to check up on them. Plus, I know if something was REALLY wrong with them they would call immediately and do whatever they had to to ensure the proper care, etc.

BAC'sMom replied: Depending on the injury, yes I still would leave my children with Mom or FIL.