how old were they, or you - when

luvbug00 wrote: you/ they went to bed alone.
Got into a huge drama with my mom tonight because I am cutting Mya off of cuddles. ( somone climbs into bed and cuddles her until she goes to sleep) In my mind she is 9 and needs to go to bed alone. It's bad enough she slept eith me until she was 4. So I'm tryng to get her to not do this every single night. ( maybe cut back to once every two weeks.)
My mom insists she needs it because I got to sleep with somone (my brother being on a bottom bunk bed and me on the top) and so Mya deserves someone to sleep with. which gave way to the argument that I was not an only child. (yea remeber this fight? it is reoccuring) and It's MY fault mya doesn't have sibling ..again.. and it's apparently "not fair" that she doesn't have one..
At any rate I want to solve this issue and explain to her that Mya needs to start going to bed alone. Everyone needs to stop babying her..grrrrrrr

luvmykids replied: All the other arguments aside, Mya is YOUR daughter and you shouldn't have to explain a thing to your mom. And frankly, as much as grandma would love another grandbaby, it's up to you to have another or not.

Having said that, my kids just about always go to bed with me tucking them in meaning snuggling and talking for about 10 minutes and then I leave the room....they're still awake. Kylie and Macie share a room so technically they're not alone, but they haven't always and Colt has always had his own room. We've done it that way since....always

I was an only child and it has it's downsides but there are plenty of upsides to it too...don't let anybody make you feel bad that Mya is an only child. She won't be scarred because of it

cameragirl21 replied: Well, I'm an only child and I went to bed alone from the very get go so to me it doesn't seem like a big deal. I also don't think I'd be inclined to co-sleep or get in bed with a child until they get to sleep but if you start doing that Idk how hard or easy it is on both parent and child to cut it off.
I also think that when you live with parents, there will invariably be parenting advice, whether it's asked for or not. At the end of the day, you are the parent and it's your decision.
Do you have the option of putting Mya in your brother's room so that she doesn't have to sleep alone and you sleep wherever Mya is sleeping? At least that would solve the argument with your mother.

bluebear replied: I went to bed alone from the beginning.

My nephew would have somebody lay with him in bed and read a book, etc.. until he would fall asleep. My cousins are now trying this system with him that if he goes to bed alone every night for x amount of time then he gets something he wants, and he chose a wii. Needless to say he's about 1 sticker away from it.

My3LilMonkeys replied:
Exactly.

My kids get hugs & kisses and tucked in and that's it. Brooke and Madison do share a room so they aren't alone though.

luvbug00 replied:

I don't sleep upstairs for the several reason

1. i know this is wayy tmi ( much worse for me to know this then you all though) But in my old room you can hear my parents "making nice" and it's not somthing i want to hear.

2. I live in the basement and have my own enterance and it's where, on the rare occasion my friends come over to visit. i can listen to music louder ( my mom naps durring the day upstairs and like i said it echos up there)

3. I stay up waaay later then they do and yell if they here me talking on the phone. again and obviously it's a noise issue compleately.

As for our good night routine. She gets kisses, we do our own tickle game and talk for a bit then I leave. The whole thing takes maybe 6 min. then I'm off and my mom will sneak in..against my request that she not..( i cought her tonight hence argument)

luvmykids replied:
I do have some sympathy for her, I'm sure she is just being a "grandma" about it. Maybe you can try talking to her when you're not mad, tell her "I know it's out of love for Mya and I know that as the grandma you get to break the rules sometimes....but when we're living here it's easier for everyone if you'd be willing to abide by the rules I have set and when we're gone, you can do whatever you want when she's here!"

She probably, as grandma, wants the snuggles as much as Mya and is trying to justify it so don't take it too personal.

Danalana replied:
I agree! I do understand your feelings, too, though.

PrairieMom replied: your kid, your rules. End of story. Maybe you and your mom need to have a discussion on boundaries.

moped replied: I agree with Tara here. I am the odd ball when it comes to parenting I think but one thing I have always said is "you are the boss of your child"....do what works best for you and stick to it!

mummy2girls replied: I co-slept with jenna for 8 months and thats because i was a single mom and working 12 hours a day so i would have to get up at 530 just to get readyf ro the day so if she woke up in the night i could just roll over and deal with her...

Breanna ...i co-slept for 4 weeks. Thats because i slept on teh futon downstairs and she was in teh bassinet ebside me... it was soooo hot upstairs at this time and i didnt want her risk of sids to go up so she slept in teh bassinet and then middle of tehnight iw ould feed her then plop her inbed with me. Then when she outgrew the bassinet at 4 weeks old We started her in her crib. at first it was heck but now we just bathe her, feed her and put her in bed awake. she protests for 2 minutes then sleeps for 12 hours:)

Your her mommy, you do what you feel is right.

A&A'smommy replied: Alyssa slept with us until she was 2 and then we got her out of our bed, she still slept with us off and on until about a month before Autumn was born she was 4 1/2. We started making Alyssa go to sleep on her own by time she was 2 1/2. Autumn on the other hand we started a LOT earlier, but that was only because she would scream when I tried to rock her

TrulyBlessed replied: Boy, that's a tough one. I think you need to follow your own instincts and do what you feel is right. How does Mya feel about it?

In my house, I still have the baby in bed with me. Alyssa stopped sleeping in my bed this year, she is six, she goes to bed alone, but shares a room with Megan. Megan went to bed alone when she was five, but she kind of just did it on her own.....

Celestrina replied: As the others have said, your child your rules. YOU know YOUR child better than anyone, so YOU know what's best for her.

I am an only child and always slept alone. DS slept in a bassinet for a couple of weeks by our bed; we never co-slept. Everyone I know who did that had issues when it came time for their child to sleep in their own bed.

Calimama replied: Miabella is 3 and she goes to bed alone. We do her night time routine, turn on the light, and close the door. I HAVE become more relaxed with letting her sleep in my bed some nights since DH is gone, but since he's almost home, she's back on her normal schedule.