moms of 2 or 3 children would you advise.....

gabriella wrote: I have one child (Sam who is 19 months old )and would really like more. I'm 36 already but would like another one or two At one time I thought about 4 but my husband soberly chipped in that we'd need a Ford Galaxy so maybe not

I like the idea of having a couple of years gap between, so that when I'm nursing the second one the first one is in school and so on. Sounds really calculating I know, but I really like the fact that I can give Sam my complete attention during the day and would want the same with the next. Not sure what my question is really just wanted to hear some words of wisdom from you out there

Thanks,
Gabriella x

mckayleesmom replied: Well...I origionally planned it like you......But it didn't work out that way. I had Russell when Mckaylee was 21 months.....I wouldn't change a thing. They are really close. They fight like heck too, but all in all they are each other's best friend. I think that there is positives and negatives to both. Im glad that they will be really close in school too. I also like that they can entertain each other a little bit too.

luvmykids replied: I have twins and their younger sister is almost 2 years younger than them ... didn't plan it that way either but I love it, like Brianne said they're very close to each other. Plus I love that when I'm done with something like bottles or diapers, it's not too long before I'm done with it all together. The thought of having them reach certain levels of independence and then having another one now is not so appealing. I put in some hard time when they were all younger LOL but now things are smoothing out a little.

C&K*s Mommie replied: If we had to do it all over again, I would gladly have children close in age like ours are. They are exactly 17mos apart. That is how great, IMO, it is to have children very close in age if that would work out better.

gabriella replied: Everything said makes sense. I guess time will only tell As for the moment we cannot plan anything yet because I had a stomach hernia and have been advised not to get pregnant in the near future. All due to having a big baby 4.5kilos (10lbs)Ouch

I'm probably going to get shouted at here (especially from Monica ) but I would love to have twins. I know...I know I've heard it all from my best friend who also has twins, a boy and a girl. Bernd and Laura are gorgeous and have just spent two weeks with us. Sigrun my best mate in Austria is a kindergarden teacher. So she has a full day of tiny-tots and then comes home to her two 4yr olds LOL the phone conversations we'd have just talking babies. Some days she was so stressed but incredibly funny telling me what her twins were getting up to. In fact, I remember her saying to me one conversation, that the next person who comments that they think it's cute and lovely having twins, I'm going to smack them in the face She'd have me in stitches

Well there are twins in my family and my husband is not getting any younger
Is there any truth in ones chances are higher if the male is over a certain age 35+??

luvmykids replied:
No shouting here, I wouldn't have it any other way. The only time I get bothered by twin comments is when people ask if I had IVF or something, or when they say "I don't have twins but I know what it's like because ..." I do understand how people think that way, because I almost feel like I have triplets sometimes but I don't assume to really know what thats like.

But twins are great, it's a wonderful experience, when they do something funny or cute in that "twin" way they have my dad always says everybody should have twins

I'm not an expert but I've actually heard the chances are higher if the woman is over 30, supposedly she releases more eggs at once giving a greater chance for 2 to fertilize, and contrary to popular belief, only identical twins are genetic. Fraternals are simply the chance of 2 eggs fertilizing at the same time.

gabriella replied: I did say I'd like twins didn't I However, I've always preferred the thought of a boy and a girl or two of the same sex, only not identical. My aunts are identical wouldn't you know

I know whatever I'd have we'd adore them (absoluetly no matter what God gave us ) But I point blank refuse to dress them in the same outfits...especially for girls. IMO this is creepy and twee

luvmykids replied:
I like having b/g twins, it's kind of like having more of the perks of being a twin and less of the pitfalls

Sarahk replied: My oldest is almost 3.5 and i just had my second baby last May. it is honestly not as hard as i thought it would be. I don't know whether i would have been able to do a newborn with a two year old though. My three year old is able to communicate betteer now and even help out a lot. Good luck to you.

Nina J replied: Emily is just under 3 years older than Odessa. Not exactly close, but not to far apart. I think it's good because Emily was more open to adjusting. I don't know if it was just her, but I think if we didn't have Odessa until Emily were 5 or something, things would've been different.

gabriella replied: Nina,

Three years between is actually the time gap I was thinking of. School starts here at 3yrs, so if Sam is ready and wants to go then he'll start in 2008. 5yrs is too much of gap I agree

Brias3 replied: We have a little bit of space between my three. Our oldest just turned 8, our middle child will be 6 in November and our youngest 3 in October. We recently decided to begin trying for another one this winter. I'm enjoying having them spaced the way they are. It allowed me time to enjoy the baby years of all the kids, without having one so close to that stage at a similar time. What with our ages, we didn't want to stretch the gaps too far (I want to be done having kids by 35) but wanted to allow a decent period of time in between. My older one adjusted beautifully both times and my daughter did well being nearly three years older than her little brother. I'm hoping the same for the next baby since, if we're lucky enough to even conceive relatively quickly, our youngest at the time of baby's birth would be nearing four years, if not four already.

Gabriella, do you live in Europe? I know you mentioned a friend in Austria, just curious. We just moved from Brussels last year

tyler&elexis'mommy replied: My children are 23 months apart and it's GREAT It couldn't have worked out better for me

Kirstenmumof3 replied: Emily and Spencer are 23mths apart and in the beginning were very close. Then they Emily started school and the sibling rivalry set in, but in the last year they have become closer. Spencer and Claudia are 5 years apart and they are very close. I think it's because he was going to school 2 days one week and 3 days the following week so he spent the most time with her.

boyohboyohboy replied: My boys are 4 yrs apart, and its been great having an older sibling to help out, but they are also closer then I thought they would be. My older son is very protective of his little brother.
I am 33 and we want to have one more child. I worry that I am getting older, and sometimes wish that I could have twins too. I think it would be wonderful to have a house full of kids.

Of course then I am sure I would have more to post about also!

gabriella replied: To answer your question Bria,

I live in Spain. We moved here over 5 years ago from England. The first 2.5 years we lived in Barcelona and then we moved from the city to live in the country. We bought a huge dilapidated old house which we planned to turn into a 'casa rural' (bed&breakfast/guesthouse). However, 3 years down the road and we're still no closer to opening our doors........It's a long story Besides which our priorities changed to include raising a family. I only wish we had started a family sooner because my age worries me a little now I guess this is also a reason for wanting twins ....

I'm so envious (in a nice way) of you who have two, three or planning your fourth already but I know it's also gorgeous just having my little man Sam

Gaby x

kellydel replied: Personally, I would have waited a little longer. My boys are 2yrs 2mos and 2 days apart, which is going good now, my oldest LOVES his baby. But, when I was pregnant I had terrible morning sickness and was, of course, very tired and Colton was going into the "terrific twos" stage and it made my life miserable. Colton got away with too much and made it really hard to discipline him later on, after I felt better. Anyway, just my two cents.

gabriella replied: Thanks Kellydel,

I hear you loud and clear We're going through the "terrific two's" with Sam now and it's tough work. I couldn't imagine what it would be like if I were pregnant also and especially during the times my husband is working away :wacko There are times I feel like I'm raising a child on my own, especially when Joost is away all week