opinions wanted

boyohboyohboy wrote: ok, so say that when you were younger, in your early 20's you did something that now in your more advanced age you are not feeling so proud of...
say, it involved other people, and even though you didnt do it intentionally to hurt the others, it did. It also changed the lives of everyone involved, including yourself...
would you go back and apologize? I mean now that you are all adults and you look back on it, you just wanted to say you were sorry....would you?

even if you knew that it might evoke some really mean comments and hateful responses from the other parties?

luvmykids replied: It's hard to say, I guess it would depend on more specifics. I think I'd have to weigh relieving my conscience by apologizing vs bringing up old pain for others. If apologizing would help them in some way, even if they were nasty, then probably yes. But if it would only make me feel better and drag up something old and hurtful for them, probably not.

PrairieMom replied: depends. What are the lives of the people involved like?
I tried apologizing once, I agonized over it, had anxiety over it, finally got the guts to do it, and when I did it, the other person was like they didn't care, they obviously weren't as affected by the thing as I was.

lisar replied: I think it depends on what actually happened. The whole situation. KWIM? I have apologized to someone from my past and she agreed that we were young and dumb fighting over a boy that in the end neither of us really wanted. At least now in life we are glad we arent with him. I guess it just depends.

cameragirl21 replied: definitely. I too would like to go back to apologize to certain people I wronged but I don't know how to reach them. If I had the opportunity to reach them, even if they were horrible to me in response, at least I could rest easy knowing that I made ammends.
Did you ever see the movie "Flatliners"? I'm a big fan of the point that movie tries to make....

A&A'smommy replied: I don't know it may bring up hard feelings that they don't want to think about... I think it would depend on what the situation was!

Boo&BugsMom replied: Well, I know for me personally, I would if given the chance and if I really felt bad about it. God must be telling you something if it is eating you up that much.

Calimama replied: Yes.. without a doubt.

kimberley replied: if it haunts you, do it. if there is no benefit to rehashing a bad experience, put it behind you and move on.

everyone grows up and changes.

boyohboyohboy replied: I never really thought about something though until it was mentioned on here several times...
its not worth making myself feel better if it makes someone else relive the hurt..
i am not trying to make someone feel worse.

luvmykids replied: Maybe you could talk to a pastor or counselor about it, see if that makes it any clearer to you whether you should or shouldn't

Teesa®© replied: Are you in contact with this person/s now? Or would you have to establish contact again? I'm wondering if there's a way for you to kinda dance around/hint about the issue to see if they even remember the incident and/or if it's bothering them as much as it's bothering you, then that'll give you the opportunity to apologize.

for whatever you decide to do