question about obesity in toddlers

Boys r us wrote: okay, my best friend has B/G Twins who are 15 mnths old. The boy is grossly overweight. He weights at least 35 pounds and he's not tall. Now, don't get me wrong, he's beautiful...but what I and others recognize as a huge health issue, my friend thinks is cute.
I try to explain to her without offending her that this is NOT healthy. She feeds him everytime he whimpers. He is taking in far too many calories, many more thanhis little body needs and can burn. Not only is this not healthy in present time, it's not healthy b/c she's teaching them poor eating habits and she's also making an early association between food and emotions, teaching them to eat when they are upset and so forth, which is not a good connection to have. She's setting them both up for disaster. I'm the first to admit that a chubby baby is the cutest, but he's not chubby, he's extremely overweight.
She gets mad when anyone says anything to her about it.
so I've stopped. Now yesterday, he was standing there holding her hand and he fell over backwards and his eyes rolled back in his head and he was limp, not breathing and turned blue. This is the 2nd time this has happened.
Of course the first thing that pops into my head is, he's not healthy...and that this could be caused by him carrying around too much for his little tiny heart to handle. I don't know..I was just wondering if any of you had heard of anything like this happening and if you think it could be related to his weight. She took him to the dr and they are going to schedule him for an EEG as their first move.
also, any advice on how to help her with getting him healthy? and helping her realize that being so big is not good for him?

ediep replied: OMG!!! That is so scary!!! I hope the doc tells her that his weight is unhealthly, if that is what is cauing the issues.

Kaitlin'smom replied: how is the other twins weight? 35lbs for a 15 month old sound a little big to me espically if he is not tall to carry the weight. I am not sure what to tell you. Do they do much activity, like playing outside or inside, walking or does he just sit around and do about nothing? Thats a tougth thing I hope the doc can help and get thing under controll now so he wont even remember it.

My2Beauties replied: Hopefully the doctor can tell her that it's his weight that is causing this. I don't know. I know Hanna is a bit chubby but goodness that is a big boy! Let us know what the doctor says about him and then take it from there. If he does say it's his weight, don't do the "I told you so" thing, just be there for her and help her with his diet.

Boys r us replied: Well, the dr has told her that she needs to be careful what she feeds them. But she doesn't change anything. I don't know, the whole thing frustrates me to no end. It's not about vanity, it's about health and somehow she doesn't get it!
She couldn't get in with his regular dr yesterday, so the other dr that they saw said it could be seizures and that's why they're doing an EEG.
The girl is chubby, but she's only about 25 pounds...which is more normal.

MomToMany replied: I think she needs to see a nutritonist to teach her how to cook/serve healthy foods to her kids. That's child abuse in my book.

Boys r us replied: She feeds them healthy food for meals, it's just that she let's them snack ALL OF THE TIME!

coasterqueen replied: Is your friend or her DH overweight? Genetics might play some roll in it, although not that much. Does her doc tell her he's overweight?

I know Ryan and I have been concerned many times about Kylie's weight but our doctor said she is completely proportionate and will just be a bit more chubby now but will slender out later and that's she healthy.

I don't know about other people's toddlers but Kylie snacks all day. I thought it was completely normal for them to do that. But Kylie doesn't have huge meals when we sit down so that's why she snacks during the day. Although we try to make them healthy they are not always healthy.

That's scary that he turned blue. Hopefully the doctor tells her what is going on and she finally starts to listen.

Alice replied: If she's not going to listen to the doctors, I'm not sure you can persuade her either. But you might be able to work on burning off the calories. When you're together, could you suggest letting the boys run around in the yard or something?? (After the doctors are done with the seizure thing, of course)Could you join (with her) a gymboree type of place so the kids would get some regular exercise? Could you and she start an exercise program- a walk around the block each night, so you can get some fresh air... and the kids could get some exercise?

For Christmas/ Birthday, could you get her a subscription to Light & Tasty magazine? You could rave about how easy the recipes all are or something, anything to get her cooking a bit lighter. At your house, could you be "all out of" junk food, but offer the boys an appealing fruit cup/ sugar free pudding, etc?

Ultimately, it's in her hands. But you might be able to sneak in a few pointers without having her feel like she's being told what to do.

...Sorry, I had to run before, but:
Could you hit some garage sales or toy sales and pick up 2 of Little Tykes toddler bikes (you know: the Fred Flinstone ones that don't hav wheels--you push with your legs)? Toys R Us usually does a buy one-get one free thing on them in the fall, so you could probably get them both for $20 or so. And/or the Elmocize video- I bet they love Elmo and maybe they'll do some of the routines along with Elmo. I'm not sure who else does exercise/dance kiddie videos, but I bet they're out there. Even start a weekly mommy exercise class to the dance video of your choice-- I bet the kids join in.

Oops-- gotta go-- more cranky kids. (HOW MANY DAYS 'TILL SCHOOL STARTS???)

Boys r us replied: Alice, those are great suggestions!! Thanks!

Karen, I've seen pictures of Kylee and I'm not sure what her weight is, but I can assure you that she looks like a happy and HEALTHY little girl! I've never thought otherwise! I don't know..I think the best thing I could do is post a picture of him for you all to understnad, it's not a chubby baby I'm talking about, it's the kind of thing where you look at him and feel utterly and completely sorry for him!

He's 15 months old..barely one..and he weighs almost 40 pounds, that's what I weighed in 2nd grade!

My2Beauties replied:

DF's little brother is about to turn 8 and only weighs 45 pounds! Geez...he does sound big!

My DSD is almost 9 however and she weighs about 80 lbs but she isn't big at all! She is just tall. Her baby brother (mom's side) is a big bou he is about 17-18 months old and weighs about 30-35 pounds...but he doens't look fat to me or obese just chubby! I would have to see a picture!

CantWait replied: Well that's horrible. All I can do is keep him in my thoughts and hope that sooner before it's too late that mom smartens up.

momof2girls replied: Like you said she is setting him up to eat bad, which is not good.

I hope he checks out fine but I would think that would scare her and she should give him healthy snacks to eat on, now it will be hard to change things for him...

let us know what happens.

MomToMany replied:
Well, if the snacks are healthy, the kids wouldn't weigh 40 lbs.

The ideas that were given are great. I hope this all works out for those kids.

Kaitlin'smom replied: WOW I really am tring to picture how big he is.......how much activity des he get? one thing I saw the other day that bugged me to no end was there was this mom (she was big--really big) grandma (big aslo but not as big as mom) and then in a stroller were 2 kids I dont know how old they are ( I do know htey were old enougth to walk and not touch things) and they were also very big kids, okay they were FAT (i dont really like the term but I guess it gives a better picture) they barily could fit in the stroller I am sorry but they should not hve been in the stroller but out walking....it would have dont them some good to get out and move, they say every little bit can help, it just discusts me that they are being pushed around when they clearly dont need to be....................sorry it just bugged me

anyway I hope she can get some help for her and the kids